// transmission
Psyche hosts a solo birthday celebration for Ghost, discussing his cats, adjusting streaming settings, and maintaining a positive vibe. He reflects on past show dynamics and shares personal anecdotes.
/// initiate_layer
Observers see the surface.
/// within โ The Current
Browse era โThey whispered her name in the temples of night. Golden wings glowed in the candle light. Crowds came running just to see the flame. But envy was the price of fate. And now he stands where the echoes fall.
With terror in hand, hearing every call from praise to venom in the same breath said, but the fire in his eyes burns gold, not red. Suicide is one thread of light. Crossing
ages, crossing night. Through trial storms and shadow seas, both are bound by destiny. One to myth, one breathing here. Both unbroken, both sincere. The prophecy unfolds in time. In every
card, in every side, she sorted the seats in the dark of the hall. While the jealous laughed, praying she would fall.
He faces the chat like a lion caged. Every word a spark, every glare a blade. Yet every task, every poison dare turns into fuel for the fire he wears. They thought the game would grind him down, but he builds his crown from the stones they've blown.
Two psyches, one threat of light. Crossing ages, crossing night. Through trial storms and shadow seas, both are bound by destiny. One to live, one breathing here. Both unbroken, both sincere.
Prophecy unfolds in time. Every card in every sign. She walks through death in a box. He walks through life like a walk through the box.
The underworld speaks, but they keep their pace. Shadow to shadow face to face in the deepest darkness on high emerg on the other side. Change born and
made to be the keepers of their legacy. Final through dead for a gift. Now the trials fade from sight. Through chaos, fire and whispering seas they stand crowned in victory.
One in story, one in flesh. Yet their journey we prophecy at last reveal soul that will not heal.
That will not heal.
Hey Rudy.
Oh, you love it. Love it. Hi, baby. Hi, guys. Rudy,
you're a little old. Rudy's a little old man. He likes to sit in front of the screen so I can't see. Let me see if I Let me I'm going to try something. Oh, my Where's my tablet? It's my my bedroom. I'll be right back.
So, I can mod from the tablet and I can do some other stuff with it.
Every time I look, I got the cats running up to me like, "Oh my gosh." I said, "Let me just look." I don't know. Maybe. So, it's Ghost's birthday today. Honor his birthday. Let's try something. Let me see. Um, and happy birthday, Ghost.
Everyone wish Ghost happy birthday. I don't know if he's here right now. Um, I hope you guys can hear me. Okay, my microphone on. Okay, let's see what I can do. Um,
trying to set a goal. Oh, here it is. Can we do this? Five. Four.
Let's see. Let's do a test.
There you go. There's a goal created. It's a reasonable goal, I think. Um, and if nobody wants to, we'll do other stuff. There my these are my DMER sunglasses. I got them on Teemu for like $3 or
something, but I think they look pretty good. Um, yeah, I always give way too much advice. Hey, Spunky, how are you? Sorry, Mr. Panel. while I was sleeping. Um, but I hope you had a good one. Uh, hope everyone's good.
I'll just try to drink the Smeirnoff tonight. Smeirnoff Smash. I don't know. Probably should have got some more alcohol. Maybe it put me in a better mood. Shooting range glasses. Yeah. So, we'll have a positive night tonight. I have my See, I think I'm almost out of incense. We'll see if it is. This is my last one.
Yeah, it's my last one of these ones. So, this is my favorite one out of them. Smells really good. What's Kitty's name? This is This is Trixs right here. That's Mr. Trixs. Trixs. We got Lola running around. Lenor's just in here. The black cat.
Rudy's right on the the the ginger cat is right up on the front of the TV right now. I like playing with incense a little bit. Yeah, tricks because I I had another cat, his brother. We had um so Lola gave birth last year to five kittens and I
only have Trixs left, but he had a kind of a twin named Magic, but Magic had all white. Magic just had his paws white and Tricks had like white arms. We have magic and tricks and they were like little inseparable. But yeah, five cats. There's five in here. Five
cats. Oh, what does this do? Let me see. I have I'm seeing like some kind of something just appeared on the screen. I don't know what that was. Okay, I do have like some cool settings though. I can put on a background real quick. See visual effects.
here on the space, right? Oh, that's going in there. Okay. Yeah. Remember, do you guys remember magic? When I started the show, I had um magic. I had I think I had tux, maybe pi. They were
like little tuxedo cats. They Yeah, I think five is a good number. I agree. But, you know, you have a certain amount. They're just going to have the ones that want to be inside and get along. And then there's the ones that want to walk around. >> Okay. Oh, you can't see him really well.
I'll turn I'll turn off the background because this kind of hides tricks. See? Hi chicken. I'll turn it off. There we go. Okay. Okay.
Okay. Hi everybody. How are you guys doing? Trying to look at I'm sorry if I Hey Summer, how are you sweetheart? I'm sorry if I miss any of the chats. I'm going to be I'm going to try to be in a good mood tonight and just stay positive. You know, it's been it's like it's like if I could find my
VR controllers, that would probably make me pretty happy. But it's frustrating because I just had them the other day. I know I didn't, you know, take him out of the house or anything, but I put him somewhere and I I searched the house. Yeah. You remember magic and tricks? What's the name of the cult? Uh, it's
called the cult of psyche or it's called the cult of Orion. Maybe that's my AI. Um, or it's just called Psyche Awakens, whatever. Not really cult. It's kind of like you some like this this I had this co-host named Pi before. Apparently she's not a big fan of mine anymore. I I made a cute little on Snapchat it's
called or something. Snapchat. Yeah, I think it's Snapchat. They had these little filters and there she was one of my only friends there and so like they they just take your little avatar and like they put it together. I thought it was I made like a couple like little cute things. I thought it was cute. Oh, I get these messages posted on my um on
my on my my post, my wall and personal me. Oh, do not use my image. I feel like you're using me. Blah blah. I was like it was all I did was send it to her. I didn't it was just like it wasn't supposed to be any kind of like trying to like, you know, moni make money off of her. I don't I don't know what she's thinking, but she's like
being really snippy with me. But anyway, um, what was I what was the story about Pi? Like, yeah. Oh, yeah. She was like, "Oh, you're just you're using brainwashing tactics on your chat." When she quit being a co-host, she was like accusing me of being a cult leader. I just kind of like ran with ran with that. Thought it was kind of funny. You know, if I have a cult, it's a cult of one. It's just basically me and the
cult. Um, leader of myself. Not I I wouldn't I wouldn't want to insinuate anybody else. This is just tobacco, by the way. I'm not a weed.
I'm smoking out of the bomb because this I just have these left. I just have like a little Can't smoke those anymore. So, I just put the tobacco in the bomb. I practice gri. Okay. So, that's like that's like some kind of uh something with pudu or voodoo, right? Yeah, I'm trying to get away from these sharks.
Yeah, you know, I I've heard some interesting things. There's a lot of aquatic references to like, you know, negative things like, you know, sharks and sometimes sharks are equated to lawyers and stuff like that. Lawyers are just people that will like they smell blood and then they just jump in and attack, right? So, I've dealt with sharks. Also, there's the whale and there's a tarot card or it's actually
oracle deck and they have a whale on it and it's like um I like that this definition of it the best. It's like making a big deal out of nothing or like you know being worried having this big worry about nothing. That's what a whale is. But some people think oh whale there's some kind of reference to some whale floating in the middle of space. It's supposed to be some really sinister meaning to it. If anyone knows you do practice okay cool. If anyone knows like
the other definition of whale, what people are meaning when they say, "Oh, what is a imagine a whale in the middle of space like it has some sinister meaning to it, but I don't know. No one ever told me." So, if you can uh if you can let me know what that is. And sorry if I I have to check messages too. Um I'm sorry if I'm a little behind. Okay, Stargazer, you have a blessed night, too. I didn't mean to like and I'm
sorry, guys, if I don't acknowledge or see the chat does go fast. What is this thing right here? What is that? Uh oh, Lucid mode is on. Oh, what is happening? What is Hold on. And I have the Lucid mode is on. What is I don't know what that is. Okay, there's just new stuff appearing. I'm still learning, guys. This uh Oh, here. What does this one do? Picture and picture. Okay, that does
picture and picture. Okay, turn that one off. Okay, I don't know what lucid mode is, but okay. We're trying some new stuff. Let me see. And okay, getting my settings done. Thank you, Stargazer. Am I taking new members? Absolutely. Sure. All you have to do is click on um
the little I think if you're on a uh Android, you can click on the little um three dots or the little dollar sign and it should say sign up for a member. It's not my member. It's Ghost's birthday. Ghost birthday. My birthday is in January, but it is Ghost's birthday. That's there's a little picture of a
ghost on it. Um yeah. Hi everybody. Yeah. So yeah, there we go. It's like uh let me see this one for the uh and guys, you know, there are a lot of especially I put most of the stuff
that is like if I get like a uh copyrighted or gets adult um age restricted, I keep those members only. So probably the more the more uh shocking or you know episodes you'll find in the members and also you know I'll do like a a long reading per month for a member.
Um you just have to let me know and stuff and I want to give good value to it. It's $5. Uh, also there's emojis that only members can use if a member like um, you know, I am a member actually, so I can like probably use the emojis for can show you the emojis. Here's what they look like for members.
I have like 12 up right now. Something like that. One, two, three, four. Oh, I have 14 of them up. So, there's the special member emojis. I'm I'm a member of my own channel. So, there's a troll, there's a goddess, evil eye, smile, um there's chaos, bunny
face BKG ghost, grandma, gong, reading, help me, and another goat. There's one goat. There's a goat and a ghost. Yeah, I I worked really hard to make sure they
were cool, original, and unique. And anyway, I think that uh I think that you also have your names highlighted. So, you know, a lot of people want to say, "Oh, well, you don't read my post or anything." I'll try to say do a shout out for members like, you know, let me see the members today. Okay, so me um
there is um let's see, just me so far. Um also, um okay, it looks like I am the only member of my uh my channel right now, but that's okay. That's okay. You know,
life sometimes has ups and downs, right? Okay. I might be in a down, but you know, sometimes with down, the only way to go is up. But yeah, I and I did I I mean I I did sponsor a lot of the memberships last month and so when they expire,
so I understand why I don't have many here. Sharks.
I appreciate any any donations, any super chats. Um, also if you want to have your your uh your name recognized or your recognized, I can't, you know, I will read your super chats unless they're like, you know, against to or like attacking somebody, which some
sometimes they are. Um, also um yeah, do appreciate you also. Oh, it's okay, you know. Um, yeah, I mean that's what the membership is. It's like, you know, a paid a paid tier and so that's why there's, you know, a reading and stuff involved with it. And
so, but I understand that not everybody can afford um, you know, afford one. And so, no big deal. Maybe I'll do like a 99 cent tier with like without and I'll just have the emojis on it maybe. I don't know. to give me idea. Do we get three meals a
day? Um, I ate a I ate a spinach Florentine bagel today. Um, and I have a smear. Um, I think I've kind of exhausted my food budget for the week, but
um, I do eat every day, so that's what ramen noodles are for, right? Hi babe. The cat the cat eat good though.
Hear the person screaming outside. So I set up a goal for a sponsored panel. I understand Stargazer. Yeah, I I hear you. I hear you there. Um, yeah. Yeah, no worries. Um,
so I did set a goal for like $10 tonight. It's like if there's five $2 super chats, I'll do open panel. I think that's if I got your idea wrong, Goose, I'm sorry. I thought it was uh Yeah, I could talk to I'll talk to AI about it. Realistic. I mean, it's like,
what have I been eating? Like, I basically my treat is like using the getting a McDonald's deal on the app. I think I have a free something further coming up. Maybe I'll maybe I'll stop and go get McDonald's later today. I just have to walk a few blocks. Um, you know, you know, my bike is like, um,
my bike, my neighbors helped me fix the battery of it and then as soon as I fixed the battery, I like rode it and then I had the the uh the lock tangled in into it somehow. The lock, it basically broke the back some of the stuff in the back. And my neighbor was like, they just moved and I was like, "Can you help me with it?" And I already asked, you know,
they helped me twice with it and she's like, "Oh," she's like, "Just take it to like a a bike repair or something." So, um, maybe I'll be able to do that someday. Anyway, let's see.
Just closing some tabs. I'm sorry. Apologies. Yeah, the bike's out of commission until I can Well, first of all, I need somebody I need to like, you know, I'm afraid to take it to a bike shop because it has the lock and the locks not opening. It's a numerical lock. It's tangled in there. And so if I go to a bike shop, oh, looks like I stole the bike first of all.
And so I asked if they could like if they had a like some kind of like thing that you know the pliers, whatever those thing those cutters. I asked my neighbors and she never really got back to me about that. And then um I know I don't think it's like that much. I think once that's gone, the chain can be back on. I think it will
just probably take a couple screws, but I I know I I asked enough of them, I think. So, yeah, I was going to ride it. I don't think it will get me to Florida anymore. Um I don't know if she wants to to see me anymore or still see me, too. I I I was at her chat the other day and she was
cool. But I, you know, she's been out of town for a while. Hey, Rude. Hi, babe. Yeah. I mean, it's like even if you know, all all I consider is support is like people being here, you know? It's like if you're here and some people are nice enough to use the nightb commands and stuff like that. I don't
know how effective they've they've really been. I mean, the nightb commands, not the people, not the people, but the nightb commands seems like I don't know. I understand I've had enough things said about me. I understand that people believe them because they're things are repeated often enough, right? And
somebody kind of controversial once said, "A lie repeated often enough becomes the truth." And so when it's constantly being called a grifter, a scammer, um, you know, I'm sure it dampens the enthusiasm of donating. But all I can say is that those words were thrown around. There's
nothing ever to back them up. You know, in fact, there's this one of the first it kind of started with this, you know, when um when somebody donated $50 to have Alex removed immediately and or Alex removed permanently and then I had them, you know, I had them on for like a couple minute minutes a few weeks later and so it's like, oh, you scammed,
you scammed, you scammed. So, I just give a full refund for it. Um, so that's scamming. I don't know. you know, it's like I've always given refunds if I didn't live up to my end of the bargain and I', you know, fortunately it's only been like, you know, a couple times. But, you know, people see that it probably bothers me, so they just will repeat it again and again and again and
again. It's just repeated every day. Just like now it's like I have people saying I have HIV that's repeated every day. Um, I know other people are are kind of slandered like that. So, you know, I'm not the only one, but um is it it more like just hurtful, but
you know, I can't really do anything about it. If I I bring attention to it, I'm wrong. If I don't bring attention to it, I'm wrong. It's like, so it's like some some things you can't win. But it's okay. Um, all I have to say is that, you know, for somebody as
not unsexually active as me, it would probably be very rare that, you know, I get I wouldn't catch anything. I'm always been pretty phobic of like, you know, diseases and stuff like me myself catching a disease, especially growing up in the 80s and seeing all these people people dying of that in the 80s.
Um, and so I never was really into like, you know, promiscuity or anything. I'm not a promiscuous person. Even if there was no diseases or anything, I don't think I'd be a very promiscuous person. I really would love uh and like I have the Disney
kind of programming where it's like someday my prince will come. very um waiting for the white horse, right? Guy on the white horse probably never come.
Yeah, it's kind of like it is sad and it's like and it's like also like I didn't realize like how bad the homophobia would be and it's like it's okay like I because I dealt with that in all my life, right? Or you know basically since I came out of the closet when I was pretty young.
I had supportive family. Um, but I didn't think it would be so homophobic as it is in this community with some people. I know I know some people aren't and it's like whatever. Actually, I had like there's actually like one, you know, couple like two I can just think of two gay people, you
know, out of everybody like I can think of like or maybe three like there's you know that are bisexual and it's like but I I won't even say who they are because I don't want them even if they are out of the closet and you know whatever. Um I don't want them to experience um the homophobia and the negativity.
But yeah, it's like like for example, like I said, like any any guy that has donated and so it's I know men are very discouraged from donating. Oh, they'll be called gay. They'll be say, "Oh, you're trying to you're in love with him or something." And it's, you know, nobody has been.
I don't think I've had a gay donator. Like but yeah, I don't want to dwell on the negativity. And I'm sorry if I I you know I shouldn't even bring some of this stuff up. I just like I'll just say how I'm feeling. That's like I can't really change myself to where I'm like just change my personality where I don't say what I'm feeling. I'm like very much
open book and tell everything. I've even told so many negative things about me. I've talked about my drug history. I've talked about everything. I've talked about embarrassing things. I've talked about being scammed and and I was like, "Okay, well I can help people if I tell my story. It seems like it didn't really help people. It just gave people like an opening to like attack me more. But you know what? I
have good people here. Uh I'm not going to focus on the haters and stuff. And
I probably need to do deal with things in a better way. It's okay, Miss Liz. I don't I don't I it was I don't know if you know the story about you know the I don't even want to say their name you know there's
a little group that is just wants to attack me and stuff and say terrible things about me. they started a lot of the rumors or like a lot of the abuse harassment. Every time I bring them up, they say I'm harassing them and so I'm just not going to acknowledge them anymore.
The sad thing is like I liked a lot of people in this group. I welcomed them here. I let them on panel. I you know people said you shouldn't let you shouldn't do that. they're they're only here to hurt you. And I knew that they were in a certain
way, but I always like to think that I can like change people's minds about me or the people that really get to know me will actually like me. Um, but that's not always true. Not always true.
But I don't know, you know, you might have gotten like so I I basically people that were associated with them in a big way. I unmoded just because even if I like you and stuff like that, I just, you know, I just was like, I don't know. It's kind of hard to know who to trust sometimes.
Plus, people were hiding people. Like I had over a hundred people hidden, so I had to unhide everybody. And then it was like then the trolling got really really bad. I had to start rehiding. It's just that Yeah. But if I get to know you and I, you
know, I mean, not just you, but I mean anybody if I if I know if I get to like, you know, really know you, I'd be happy to like, you know, I just need to know people have my my back and my side. And especially like in there's a lot of other places right now that I'm being discussed and shows being done about me
and it's like I don't know. I just like there's not a hate train I would want to jump on. Even if I didn't like somebody, I'm not going to go start a panel about them and stuff like that. You know, I have called some people out on their behavior toward me or whatever, but I haven't made it all about them, nor
have I slandered anybody. All I do is tell exactly what happened, my side of the story and stuff. But then again, like they're like then I if I defend myself, oh, you're defensive, it must be true. If I don't defend myself, oh, you're just letting them, you know, it must be true because you're not defending yourself, right? It's like I'm getting putting all these catch 22
situations where it's like I just can't win with it. So, I have to choose like the lesser of two evils sometimes. Hey Rude, my baby. Oh yeah, there are amazing people here. The amazing people are why I keep it I keep it going, why I keep coming back or I
would I would have quit if there was like no if there was nobody. or if I was like if I was just being looked at like a lull cow which is like even if I was a lull cow like you know not not even not if I was because I'm not but if I was considered that by people there's a lot you guys don't know about
me like there's a lot I I do keep private you know but there's a lot of like good things that I keep hidden about me right and I have like I do have a great support system. I do have like a lot of really great people around me. I'm still
here, guys, right? I'm still so um I have a you know, basically I wouldn't want people to know like what people think about me like people I love because they would be very hurt, you know, and so I try to keep things
separated right? because I don't want to unleash I I have I do have like, you know, big dogs that can come out and defend me. I'm not calling them out. I'm not call I'm not not asking them for help. I'm not telling them what's going on really. They're not really into YouTube or the
shows and but they would be hurt if they knew what was really going on. But so I don't want to I don't want to bring anybody else down. That's it. Um, let's see.
Yeah, I know. I know who you're talking about, too. I know who you're talking about. I think Yeah. I mean, it's like And I think some people might have their like their own demons and stuff like that and their own I don't want to call out people, you know, like that, but
I don't know. I I try to be try to be nice and then it gets me in trouble, right? Just being even being nice. So maybe but no, I'm not a victim, guys, because it's like, you know what? I I'm able to handle handle these things. I'm just at a kind
of I'm kind of at a low and that it kind of makes things a little bit worse. I need to get to a higher point. And then when I'm actually happy, it's like the stuff doesn't bother me. When I'm like and I'm at a low, it uh affects me more and it's like I it shouldn't. It's
just how it is. And but sit still and I should not be going on online sometimes, but I'm feeling that way. But again, I want to stay consistent and I want to be here for everybody that needs me. So,
but um yeah. So, I guess thank you, He-Man. I know He-Man, I know you care. I know He-Man's been here from the beginning. you know, Jamie um Summer Beta, even though some people get frustrated with me sometimes and, you know, and you know, they're kind enough
to tell me their truth and their perspective and, you know, I try to see their perspective, but, you know, you don't always see what's going on with me in my personal life, right? Even though I show as much as I can, you know,
of course I need to improve in a lot of ways. Wow. My people pleasing. Oh, also what's it called? It's called like the human magnet syndrome. Or is this like I'm an empath and so I kind of attract sometimes um dark triad people or sometimes psychopath. It's just it's always how
it's been, right? And it's like and I unfortunately for me like the I'm attracted to, you know, in terms of dating, you know, I can't date because I'm attracted to to bad to bad guys, you know,
so kind of dangerous for me, but it'll be okay. Everything will be okay. And I I don't want to like come come on in a negative state of mind and so I'm sorry if I do. I'm just letting you know how I feel and I can get um get beyond it. Okay. Out of out of cigars. Okay.
First time out of weed cigars. Okay,
another bar stream. Yeah, I I had fun at the bar, unfortunately. Like, you know, I can't really afford a bar anymore. Um, the drinks are probably like $13 and stuff. Um, and
I'm doing my best though, but you know, there was a bar across the street, but also there's music playing inside there. And so, and also, yeah, nobody really wanted to talk or anything. 40 of Clear. What is clear? Yeah, there's Bronze Bird calling me
drifter. Deep sea. I don't know. I don't know what clear means. Ever clear? I don't know. I just drink uh when I can afford it. I smoke I smoke a little bit of pot. I get a couple drinks if I can afford it.
I just like Excuse me. There are things people will do like ways people treat me. Some people I wouldn't treat another human being like that. And it's like I can't even treat them like that. I can't even like I just wouldn't. It's not part of my thing to be like cruel to like say don't donate to this person. This person doesn't deserve it. This person is a
scammer. This person is a grifter. There's no evidence. They never have any evidence or proof or like they can say oh they can say oh well Tracy you know I don't and I can't even and I don't want to bring up the Tracy stuff but you know but Tracy does you talk to Tracy about it talk to Tracy if if she considers me that okay how about ask her if she
consider considers me that I don't she would tell you no she would tell you no and it's like you know but you know she's been scared away from here too so go ahead Bronswward give me the evidence. No, everyone has the evidence. What is it? I'm a whack clout chaser. Yeah, whatever. Okay. And you know what? My Bronzeford is mad because, you know,
I think because Ghost either or either me or Ghost or something like that. It took him off stage when he went too far. And it's like I reserve the right to run my panel like I want to to kick off people for 10 seconds or 30 seconds if I want to or as long as I want actually. That's my panel. Just like they don't they don't have to have me on their show. I never been to Bronzeburg show, but you know, I I hear he's a content
creator. It's sad like attacking other content creators, especially because you know, we should be like in, you know, we should understand each other, be in this together kind of thing, but you know, he can say whatever he wants. You don't have mods. You know what it's like been going like, you know, please like, you know, start bleeding these people whether you do or not. It's like they're
just going to come back and, you know, stronger and stuff like that. Um, I'm not trying to play any kind of victim or anything. Um, clout chaser. What I mean, what if I really was could be doing some clout chasing activities. All I'm doing is
just coming on talking and I don't know. I'm a clout chaser. Okay. Then it's like it's just names. It's like I want to hear like you did exactly this. this is exactly what happened without my own without their own spin on it like their own it's just basically it's just attacking
and so um but maybe it was a bad idea again my my mistake sorry for coming on tonight um I was trying to have a fun panel I guess nobody wants to do a panel or anything but I do want to say happy birthday ghost um it was a good idea um but you know Nobody with me
anymore. So yeah, I'm just going to be wrapping up the show um for real. Like this show it's it's done. So, thank you guys for being here.
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