The Crystal Ball Showed Something They Didn't Expect

I walked into the temple wearing Crocs

and a velvet cape.

Saw a raccoon reading tarot yelling,

"Bro, your aura is great."

Crystal ball was full of Mountain Dew

and nic smoke. A skeleton DJ play the

Lamin and told a dirty joke. I got none

sold in lightning for $39.99.

Said sign here in dragon blood and

everything will be divine. Some dude

named Kevin summons bez by accident. Now

demons in Hawaiian shirts are asking

where the bathroom went.

Everybody chanting weird stuff backwards

in the rain.

Somebody's grandma crowd serving,

screaming, "Open up the veil."

The moon looked down embarrassed like I

do not know these men. Then Psyche rode

a shopping cart straight through the

astral plane. WELCOME TO THE CULT of

psyche. Candles melting on the Harley.

Laughing with the shadow. People at the

haunted after party. Tarot cards and

disco lasers. Goat head and motivational

speakers. Everybody levitating badly.

Open fire pizza and tequila.

>> Oh no.

>> The oracles possessed again.

>> Oh yeah.

>> Playing violin.

Welcome to the cult of psyche where

enlightenment gets weirder.

We got forbidden knowledge store inside

a Taco Bell. A wizard cursed a soda

machine. Now it only spits our spells.

There's a vampire in the parking lot who

only drink trouble. A possessed womba

chanting Latin wallet headbutts crystal

skulls. An ancient monk from Atlantis

started beef on live stream chat cuz

somebody called a sacred robes. A table

cloth from habitat.

Meanwhile, psych out of broken TV sets

giving cosmic life that chain smoking

mars.

Protect your piece. The raccoon cried

then stole somebody's wallet. A demon

did a kick flip past the person

mechanical parad. The eye of it started

blinking through the rhythm of the base

and every weird rejected soul was

dancing face to face.

Welcome to the cult of psychic where the

prophets f dramatically. Skeleton march

band playing doom rifts automatically

go discover

damation.

Welcome to the cult of psychic. Astro

Walmart gladiators laughing under neon

pentagrams

with psychic alligators. If the world

outside is boring,

come get strange and disappear.

>> Welcome to the psychic. We're here to

show this side of fear.