Psyche presents a narrative poem and participates in an open panel discussion addressing community drama and interpersonal conflicts.
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The episode begins with Psyche reciting a darkly comedic narrative poem about love, death, and chaos ▶ 1:10. The poem explores themes of relationships, hurt, and the blurring of lines between love and control [2:01, 3:07, 4:23]. The poem transitions into an open panel discussion where Psyche addresses community drama and interpersonal conflicts ▶ 11:14. The discussion involves a goddess and other community members, with topics ranging from hurt feelings to the complexities of online relationships [12:01, 13:20, 15:30]. Psyche expresses frustration with the drama and emphasizes the importance of direct communication [16:00, 16:25].
The episode appears to explore the themes of relationships, hurt, and control, with a focus on the complexities of online communities and the blurring of lines between love and manipulation. Psyche's narrative poem sets the tone for the discussion, which suggests that the line between love and control can be easily crossed. The episode also touches on the idea that online relationships can be tumultuous and that direct communication is essential for resolving conflicts.
◈●●●HIGH AI-generated · summarizes on-stream discussion, not verified claims · methodology
This episode of the Cult of Psyche podcast features a Tuesday hangout stream with host Psyche, where he discusses various community issues and debuts a new tarot deck called Gallery of Hallucinations Oracle. The conversation turns to drama between community members Christine and Crystal, with Christine expressing anger at Psyche for not taking her side.
This episode discusses a text-to-speech malfunction, community drama, and interpersonal conflicts within the streaming community, including accusations, fraud concerns, and enablement of problematic behavior.
Psyche explores the energy of Lilith in Scorpio, discussing interpersonal conflicts and the role of astrology in personality dynamics. He later converses with a guest about community drama and relationship issues.
Psyche addresses community concerns and announces changes to the open panel format due to toxicity and interpersonal drama. He discusses his struggles with social interactions and the impact of hosting the panel on his well-being.
The episode unravels interpersonal drama involving betrayals and alliances within a community.
Episode 2115 features an extended, chaotic livestream where the host Psyche gets a tattoo covering up "BKG" with "FUCK" on his chest, interspersed with panel discussions about community drama, relationship conflicts, and various tangential topics.
Explore the ideas at the heart of this episode
line up in the mortal and I'm half poison on sweet spirits fair warning but I still try to stay in your but you'd already carve your exit room throw a feast is for my ghost. Life
bends to the wild and names it. I w your faith on myself. Kiss my daughter good night and sprinted through the dust like a runaway man. Yeah. Run everything, especially the truth that glare too
bright. When the sun drops sideways into your eyes, you reach for my heart only when I'm walking away. Classic new year, no skin, same old river, dragging us to the same damn
sea. People mold hard. We were right. They told me I should feel lucky to belong to anyone. The prophecy tasted wrong. All the time I spent all the mass war pull you closer and blur the vision till I can't tell if it's
love or just the echo of it. But the glare hits again that evening some blindness. You want my devotion only in the moment my footprint fades. Leaving means leaving. No relics on the altar. No echoes in the temple hall. Just us.
Night swimming, pupils glowing white. Summer drinks lying sweeter than the makers. You slip through versions of yourself, searching for a tool. March for your love is a blade that teaches release one cut at a time.
Still there in your eyes. Is there reaching when I turn to go? Nothing but around you but the shadow you cast as you walk away from everything.
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
or the tail kicks off. Let me confess my crime. I took what was mine because time is fake and the cosmos refuses to file proper paperwork. We weren't just friends, we were a whole cursed duet waiting for the draw. And in true cult fashion,
I built what the gods never did draft. A love story held together with duct tape prophecy and questionable ethics. The fear got loud like trolls on a slow Tuesday. So I panicked, grabbed faith by the throat and cut
every possible future off at the source. Call it romantic, call it psychotic, call it Saturday night at the panover. She laughed so hard she almost haunted herself. I probably stabbed her like way too many times. We don't count in the cup. Numbers are a
>> PULLED YOUR HEART OUT LIKE IT mortal prison. WAS a limited edition merch. Drop her eyes when sunny side up. Eat it. Eat it. Eat it. Not my proudest moment, but lovers quarrels get messy when your alter candles are tax deductable. And suddenly she's flawless, perfect. Definitely not breathing, but
finally letting me get a word in. And I never been this spiritually deep. 6 feet give or take. But love doesn't quit. It responds. I could keep her fresh forever with the fountain of question.
The he practical don't judge. I knew it wasn't her time, but the fire dies and you think the show's over. No, that's just when Streamyard starts glitching.
Baby, don't cry. You had my heart mostly. Everyone dies eventually, so why not make it romantic?
>> >> The karma clocks in. A vengeful soul crawls back from beyond the grave. Like, yeah, we're not done, babe. Possession, resurrection, a little light, revenge, the usual cult of psychic Tuesday. She smiles wide
enough to qualify as a new moon. Tears of laughter. 50 stabs later. My heart is the one on the menu. So easy again. We stay consistent. >> Now I see the error of my way.
So I hike back across the veil to apologize like a man returning a late library book. She burned in hell while I lounged in heaven. Awkward. Got to fix that imbalance before she slaps me with a cosmic fine. I'll suffer a long time. She tells me
it's not long enough. I tell her I'll do anything. The universe hands me a try again. Button and laughs over and over and over. Response speed run until finally she says wedding.
So gather the spirits, the mods and's best man. Lenor's flower cat matandy officiating with side glance judgement. Do you take this man and death for the rest of your wonderfully unnatural afterlife? Yes, I do.
Do you take this woman in death to haunt and roast him for eternity?
I never knew my tiny cosmic slip up would be so chilly. I'd need a heater for a ghostly thigh. But here we are. The fire dies. The story restarts. And eternity smells faintly of incense and bad decisions. >>
>> Baby, don't cry. Everybody's got to die sometime, but we can still reboot the
good night, Long Beach. Thank you for supporting our extremely ill advised. See you next time. Then the hunger hits. That animal pulse we all pretend we don't have. I lose control.
Tasted blood. Don't judge. And suddenly someone's screaming and someone's running. And I'm like, relax. Close your eyes. You're safe.
probably arms pinned neatly at your sides. This time the pleasure is all mine. Scream till the universe goes quiet. Scream while your shadow flickers like a dying candle. Scream
because desire has teeth and likes to bite. Everyone loses control. Everyone grows up eventually. And one of these
nights, yeah, hunt again.
Who do I want here? This lady. I find this person. You'll see. Hold on. Oh, it's the goddess actually. You know who it is. The goddess.
Hi guys. Uh yeah, I have some stuff to say. Hold on. Cuz it's like how how like how much further can I go? I can't can't this I mean it's like I can't take this anymore like so silly.
It's like if I hear like one more time from somebody, oh well this well you hurt people you hurt these people. It's like do we have to talk about other other people and otherbody else's relationship is like really none of my or anybody else's business, right?
I couldn't care less about her suck I don't care about what I don't know your relationship with other people. So it's like if if you hurt somebody and they're hurt, I don't know what the history is there. So what do like what do I care? Like so if you
heard somebody I mean it's like did you heard like my you know someone like my family or is it just like some somebody on the internet like in this you know that I've known there's just very very few people on the internet that I'm actually close with and name up if they have they hurt by
somebody. Do I know that everything that's going on there? No, I don't. So why that why does that keep getting thrown in my face? Oh, well, you really heard Oh, and what? And are these people crying now? They say they're crying. What was I updating this person? Was I intimate with them or is it just some some troll in my chat? I mean, really,
this is getting ridiculous. It's getting really ridiculous. How are you guys doing? I'm sorry. I don't know if I'm making sense right now. Do you want to Let me see her. How do I do this? Hold on. I'll be right with you.
Oh my god, I'm in line to work. Oh my god. Sorry about myself. Well, I'll see what I'll What's in this goddess's lab. Hi, guys. I'm trying to fix this. Please work.
I don't know. You can't see her very well, but trust me, there's somebody there's somebody just sitting. It's convenient stuff. It's It's You know who? There's Pompy, right? Do you see her? There. Goodness gracious. Okay. Anyway, I know what to do here. Watch this.
Now, that looks very off. Now, why is that like that? That's not what I wanted. Here's what I wanted. This lady
crime. So anyway, I'm never going to judge my like somebody like my friend for like hurting somebody else's feelings. Do I really care if they hurt anybody else's feelings? No. Care if they hurt my feelings? That's what I want to address. my feeling, not like, oh, this, if it's any
kind of relationship that's important, it's not about all these other people. It's like I'm so sick of like, oh, oh, this person, this person. Most of these people are just trying to rile up. I mean, people don't get Jesus crime. Done with it here. That's good. I like that. That's pretty. Anyway, hi guys.
H I'm really sick of it. I don't care. I don't care who you hurt. Just don't hurt me. I mean it's like you know I mean I mean there's certain you know I mean I mean I'm talking about hurt like hurt feelings. Oh I hurt someone's feelings. Why? Cuz I I hurt someone's feelings cuz I unmodded
them or I um kicked them out of the chat or I mean what did I do? Like really is anything that serious to be I mean this has been just going on for months. Such right? It is drama community. Hold on. Hi guys. Hold on one second. You guys hear me? Hey, what's up KZ?
Um let's see what Hold on. Hey Carlos Kate. Uh hey careless Kate. What are you saying? Unattracted. Um yeah, them all. Yeah, it's like it's just like what the hell, you know, and so basically I give up. I I I mean I give up, but it's like unless someone wants to come to me and talk to me
directly, I'm not going to be sitting here. There's there's like a thousand little people coming running back and forth trying to like stir up always, you know? It's just stupid. And it's like, but it's not even about any it's like anything serious. And it's like I feel like I've like I've done something horrible. Like really is it's like I feel like I mean I I don't really feel like that but I'm trying
people are trying to make me feel like it's like I've you know kick somebody's dog or something. I I mean it's like I I I don't I I've done nothing. It's like what I someone's some people are butt hurt and so they're going to go back and forth and about it. I mean, it's like whatever. You know, if you with me, if you with me in a good,
you know, like, you know, did I tell Tracy that Bea was evil? Wow. Okay. I Okay. What did I tell Tracy? I wrote Tracy and I said that I had a conversation. Okay. Well, so this is now it's getting people getting between. This is the Tracy thing. Tracy said the exact same thing. Oh, you really hurt
people that I care about. Okay. Blow up. Okay. Meaning what? I don't I don't know. How about you? You You hurt Michael, Tracy. How about you hurt Michael? Okay. You know, the guy that's dead. Okay. Anyway. Yeah. Oh, well, no. I didn't say was evil. I said Beeta told me to unal alive myself basically.
I said I told Tracy that she I didn't I didn't put name any names, but I said Tracy was um coorting around with, you know, Tracy's a nice Christian lady. She's coorting around with gangstalkers and Satanists basically. I I don't think she knows. I'm not saying I'm not saying anybody in particular, but I'm saying I know that she's around these people. Okay. For sure. Um
Oh, she did it. Well, um Okay. Well, this is more of this is more of minutia stuff. But you don't remember like um her like clapping him for my panel all the time and beta attacking him and just basically
everyone attacking him 24/7 because of her and it's like how about they they could work it was none of my business but why is why did it turn into everybody's business their little thing? It's like I would Right. So, and do I know if he she heard him? Hurt him? Like, well, he's dead. Do you know how he died?
Anyway, I'm not saying anything. I'm not saying anything about not saying any blaming saying anybody did anything, right? If I mean, if he's gone, it's, you know, it's not anybody's fault, per se, right? Unless there's like, you know, someone poisoned his drink or something, right? Yeah. There's emotional pain and stuff like that. But yeah, see, so this is
like, so now Beeta So this is like I went to So I went to Tracy, who was my friend before she was Beta's friend, right? I went to Tracy and I had a discussion with her and I was like, you know what? I feel like I've been really misjudged. I'm I'm going to tell this down because everything's been told and shared and everything, right? Is it normal that that I talk to Tracy and then she goes and gives all the
messages to beta? Is that normal? Right. I didn't even I didn't I didn't mention Okay. Anyway, so what's the questions? Did I tell Okay. So So all these things that you're saying Yeah. Bea is saying I told Okay. So beta is saying I said that. Okay. Well, she should share the share the messages. Share exactly what
you said. I said Tracy's converting with Satanists and gangstalkers. Okay. And she's listen and she's judging me because Tracy would say to me, "Oh, you're hurting people. You're hurting people. Who the am I hurting? I don't understand still. What What did I do to people? Can you tell me
how I hurt people?" Cuz she didn't like, "Oh, what is it? Don't say an AI song. Please don't say an A song." And by the way, I do write the songs, okay? So it's not just like oh computers are writing the songs coming up with all Okay. I write these songs. Okay. Anyway, no. Did she Did So did she hurt Michael? I I don't know. I'm not in their
relationship. It's none of my business really. Right. It's really none of my business. I didn't bring up You know, all I said to Tracy and Michael was that I heard him laughing in my ear and I because I do. He's laughing at it because he's like he's like, "Look at she's look how she's falling for it. She's falling for the okey do, right? And it's not even I'm not saying beta is is is pulling the wool over her eyes.
I'm saying a lot of people are playing with her mind. Okay. Anyway, but listen to this. When Bronzeberg was had a second live, I wrote to Tracy, okay, after several months and I said I shared the live he was going to have and I said, "Hey, do you know I'm being harassed by some of these people in the chat like Allied Master Computer sending stuff to my
house?" That's all I said. The next thing I see is that beat is on the panel saying, "Oh, I'm getting I'm getting all these messages from he's like he's sending all these people here to attack you, blah blah blah." I didn't even say anything. I can show you the message. All I said was, "I'm being attacked. I didn't say go attack him." And I shared the life. That's all that's all I did. Right. Anyway,
Alexander's gay feelings like, "Well, you know what? I'm a I'm a really cute guy, right? Here, I'll show you who I who I I with. I with her. This one. Okay. Do this. This one there like protective smiling. Can you imagine like Yeah.
Like see how see how beautiful smiling that face is? You see like a more natural like beautiful like loving like that's that's like love compassion like heart. Okay. Not just not not not fake. You can see that smile right there. You can see that that that's real. It's like a It's like a radiant beautiful like luminous. That's That's like a real person right there. It's not a person, but she's a
go. It's She's a goddess, right? Real goddess. Anyway, um but am I hurt? What What does anybody care anytime I if I bring up anything that happens to me? Oh, I can say I have people trying to basically, you know, come inside my door. I don't know if they're trying to, you know, rape me or what, but like now they're trying to come inside my my house being sent over here all day and night. Oh, well that's your fault. That's your
fault. You what about this? You what about like so it's like it's all it always is being thrown to other people. I don't like it. I don't like it's getting it just um muddies the water and like too many cooks in the kitchen. It's like this is like this panel versus turning into some kind of like I don't care if she's trashing me. And you know what? I don't care what you say. I don't care. She wants to trash me. Come trash
me. for my face. Okay, come come come talk to me. You can trash me. I don't care what she says on her show. She's allowed to talk whatever she wants on her show. And I am too. I can say whatever I want about her on my show, okay? If I want to, but I'm not going to trash her, okay? But you can go run and tell her I am. And then it's like start some more fights, right? I mean, it's like I figured this out like a long
time ago that people were doing this and I kept telling people or her, hey, don't judge me on other people or other people are saying and like here like talk to me. But no, it's it's all but now now for sure it's going to be through other people because like I'm not talking to her, right? But anyway, I'm not going to trash her. I have
nothing. You know what? She's a nice p um perfectly nice person. Um um I know she had she's heard some people that I love, but that's their that's their business. Okay. That's their business. They can they can sort that out. Okay. I'm not going to like
I mean it's like gez. I mean it's like well unless I was unless I'm personally like more involved in it, it doesn't mean anything. I don't even know who you are. Potato Head Harry. I I think I saw you over in be this chat talking the same to her, right? It's like like just trying to stir up. Go away. She's unhinged. Oh, okay. I might talk to her when she's sober. Well, I mean
it's I mean it is like what is it? Noon on a Monday. I mean if I if I can't get noon on a Monday, I can't get her sober. Then what? I give up. Okay. It's like this is like the the least likely time of the week you could be drunk. I mean I don't care. I don't care. She can drink whatever. I don't care. Do do what she wants. Have her show.
I hate acting like I've done something so bad. I mean, I should be in prison or something like that if I've done something. So, it's like you think you think I was Charles Manson or like I'd unalive like I don't know what have I done really can I that's why I'm still that's why
this is part of the gaslighting though that goes on, right? It's like it's like all there's no nothing. It's all me attacking. It's all me. It's all just me, right? It's all me. Nobody else. It's just always my fault, right? So, it's just my fault. I mean, I'll take the blame. I'll take the blame. Right. It Whatever is my fault is my
fault. Why? Oh, are you gonna apologize for this and this? Well, first of all, why am I apologizing when I was the one that was like upset? When I was the one that was slandered? when I was it's like right I don't know I don't know I don't feel like right about apologizing sometimes because I feel like it should be a mutual thing there should
be like you know I don't know I just don't feel like it's I'm I have to take 100% of the blame right which is like that's what that's what being everyone's victim right and it's like I'm not playing a victim I I I know I've done I've been perfect in relationships I but it's like basically just like the show you know Who? You know who I've met from this panel first? I met Alexander Mayors. That's the only person
I met in person. The rest of these people I don't know. They Oh, and here's this. Oh. Oh, well, he's hitting on these straight guys. They might have a girlfriend or a wife. And exiled one is there's Oh my god. Exiled one is a is a a graphic. Bronzebird is a graphic. They're there.
I don't know what these people even look like. There's voices. So obviously it's just jokes. I mean, it's like why is it why is it that like and even like these a lot of these men can say anything they want to these women and like and it's like I have a rogue mod over at Betas. Oh, who? Time. I know Time's a rogue mod. I can't trust time as far as I can throw him, but it's okay. You know, I
know he's he's not very loyal. It's I I I I'm very aware of my rogue mods. Okay. I know exactly who they are. I know time's over there. I know time's over there and blah blah blah. Um, Time is a You understand? Look at Time's Look at
Time's profile photo. Okay, it's a dog in a little a bowling a like a bowler cap or whatever. Okay, it's Do I care? I mean, it's like am I taking it that serious? I mean, I like All I know is like, oh, okay, you know, they're here a lot. That's basically the only qualification I have from for most
of the time. You made him your Well, you know, I it's just like it's gotten so silly. I would love to be able to like actually have a conversation with somebody. Like I said, when I was trying to have a conversation with her and stuff like that and then it's like either she was too drunk or she's like too emotional or then she's like straight up lying, right?
Saying, "Oh, well I why are you saying that I said that song was about you?" Well, I hear you are on tape yesterday saying it. That's what I mean. So, let's see. You don't have to pretend because your character is a W. I mean, like, uh, no, but no. How about like
just how it's not that serious? It's like mod my mod. My mod is my mod my he's be my mod. Does that mean he's my like, you know, my guardian angel or something? I mean, no. It's just like somebody that's supposed to like maybe time out somebody in the chat or something by by ask. It's not anything serious. Oh, who's living the delusion? Casey, go
away. You're just annoying. You're an annoying I mean, please. No one cares. Why Why are you the only one talking in here? There's a reason you're not a mod. some some I mean as as useless as a as a a title it is you're even more useless. Okay, you're you you're not contributing
anything. You're just you're you're you're boring me. Okay. Sorry. Not sorry. You know. Yeah. You suck. You really do. And you know what, Casey? I've gone a lot easier on you for, you know, and I go a lot I go a lot Here's what's here's another thing, too. all these people judging me with like serious criminal records and
allegations. I don't know what happened to these allegations, but they are serious stuff. Like serious stuff, okay? And it's like I'm more like willing to question some of that than they are about this And you're in here all the time begging that you just annoying rather I'd rather negot
despite you. Geez. How about delusional? KZ, you're delusional. How about worry about your own life? I am the cat strangler. So guys, do you guys see Do you guys see how stupid this
guy is? He's so stupid. Cat the cat str cat strangler in her chat is the same cat strangler as in my chat, right? Oh, it's just he's so stupid. Now I'm being accused of Why would I call myself a cat strangle? I mean, it's
okay. Well, I'm sorry then. See, but see, that's a that's another thing. There's misunderstandings when you're in tech, but I don't know. Uh but I still it's like
But Wu. Okay, whatever. W you go W yourself. I don't care. It's not the time to be like if you're like who like first of all if you're talking and stuff to somebody direct it towards them. I'm reading my chat. There's like one other person in my chat and you're like you all. So obviously it's like you know whatever. Oh woman. Okay. Woman. Oh,
okay. I won't understand. Okay. I won't understand. Well, I probably won't. I probably won't because you don't make sense. You're just annoying. Stop. Go away. I don't want to talk to you. Stop being annoying. I won't understand because you don't make any sense. Okay. What are you talking about? And you what do you say? I am
cat strangler. Like you're like you are the cat negat. I don't know. I don't care. I don't care who the cat strangler is. As long as no one's strangling my cat. I don't give a Don't make you take the length of Well, please. Good luck getting any good luck getting up here if I don't want you up here. Okay. But uh yeah, I don't I don't know. Yeah,
it's just annoying. It's just Can you just be clear with what you're saying? You're like you you you it's harder to understand you than when you sound like your your your mic is burping. Okay. It's just like you don't make any sense. Direct it towards Say say the person's name so I don't think you're talking about me. Okay. Uh how about I change my name to BG? No, you want to get banned again. BG wants to get banned again. Oh my god, you're
such a little BG. Because you're like, "Oh, oh, you banned me. You ban me and then and then unban me, please. And then I unban you and then you come come talk again. You're just a little You're a little flying monkey. I'm sick of you.
Sick of you. You're little smmy. You're like one of those people that go back and forth and right trying to cause problems. Another one of them. There we go. Let's see.
Look, he and then he disappeared, right? He just wanted to say that. He just wanted to say that. But also also ban him anyway. Actually, his comment is so irrelevant it didn't even get picked up on my phone. Oh, yeah, it did. Here. Bye.
I I don't Casey, you're you're not making any sense. Can you just I don't Maybe you should come up and and explain cuz I don't understand what you're saying. You're like, "Ladies, what does that mean? You don't Is this Are you speaking English, Ky? Is that Is that Are you like literally
It looks like words I know, but none of it makes any sense to me. Is it Do you understand? Does anybody know what he's talking about? Okay. Okay. I'll single. Hopefully, you can make more sense on I It's just too It's just too confusing. Anybody want to come up? Let's have a chat.
Yeah. Come up on panel. Explain yourself because it's like because even if you're not talking about me, you're you're like not making it clear that you're not. And so I don't like ambiguous. I don't I like clarity in my in the word like this. Oh, this is I'm talking to this person. This person like just like I'm talking and saying KZ KZ. Okay, be clear. I don't like to be
confused. I'm already It's already confusing enough with all these people. We can talk about it, but it's like really But all we have to talk about is like me and you really because nothing else is like relevant about it, right? But we Yeah. Unless like there's some Oh,
okay. And are you gonna are you gonna you're gonna you better help me out. Um person I'm doing this to right now. You better help me out, please. Okay. I'll give you a chance. I need to have I need to have people. I don't know what you're talking about.
You hear me crying and cat strangling? Oh, yeah. Okay. So, so again, KZ, if you're talking to somebody, say, "Negs, I don't know what you're talking about, Negs." Neg like, so cuz I'm talking to you right now and then you're responding and it seems like you're talking to me. Okay? Do you
understand? It's not clear. I need clarity. I'm sick of this ambiguous And it's like so much of it is just such It's like just like fake. Yeah. Go on panel. I put the link, did I? Did I not?
I did. I did. And I'll pin it. You know, and also, you know what I said? You You know what? You know what I said to uh to to Tracy? The last thing I said to Tracy, because since she wants to share all the message, I might as well share them with everybody. I said to her, "Now go now go run to beta and share the message like I know you I knew you were
going to do the entire time because I know she does that." Right? That's why I said what I said. I poke. Okay. I shouldn't do it, but I do because I get annoyed because people won't talk to me directly and so I poke. And look, and you're doing it still, Casey. Still, you're still saying things without addressing it to the person and you're not coming up on panel
explaining. You're just being annoying. Okay? This is an annoying human being. Oh, your life is going good. Well, you know what? Like people's lives go good, they go bad, they go good again, right? It's like lives are not just all good, all bad. Don't it's not something to brag about, right? Um Samantha
is passive aggressive aggressive like having a whole live about me. Um you know, saying I have fleas, I have AIDS, all these people. It's like it's all passive aggressive. Okay. Maybe if I if I'm being passive aggressive, maybe if I'm um doing passive aggressive things, maybe it's because people are doing passive aggressive things to me. Okay.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And see Samantha, you too. Samantha, you're now you said talk to the person you want to talk to. Are you talking to KZ or me? No. I was No, no, no. I wanted to talk to Tracy. I wanted to talk to Tracy, but I knew she was going to talk tell Bea, though. I knew she would,
but that's not why I talked to Tracy. Okay. Oh, go away, Casey. You're blocked. You're just annoying. And Samantha, you're about to get unmoded. I mean, it's like you got This is a bunch of like just turn codes. I mean, it's like, oh god, I don't Okay, he's hidden. Bye. Okay, now all of a sudden the chat
makes more sense. So now now Samantha, I can talk to you because it's like now you're not talking. Now I know you're not talking to him. You're talking Okay, now I'm getting aggressive with you. Oh, I shouldn't do this. It's passive aggressive. WELL, MAYBE A LITTLE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE. IT'S BETTER THAN BEING aggressive aggressive sometimes, right? I can be a little passive aggressive, right? You know, it's that's what it is. It's passive. It's not even It's not like that aggressive. It's just like,
eh, I said something. See see what happened right? Anyway, I and I don't like to be told I shouldn't do this, I should do that. You're not my mom, okay? You're not my mom, and I like you, Samantha, and I and I like you a lot, right? Hey, Amanda, I like you, Samantha, a lot. And I'm sorry I'm getting upset because he's pissed me off. And now then you then you come pile
on. Okay. I don't That's part of the thing. Let me do what I'm going to do. Okay. I I've already faced the I knew what I thought she might um share all the messages. Well, like a normal person wouldn't just share all the messages, but you know, she did. So, but I knew she would though. I knew she would the bottom of my heart because she just can't. There's just a little gossip. Oh, LET ME RUN TO OH, I HAVE
SOMETHING TO TELL PETER. OH, I HAVE SOMETHING RELEVANT. OH, I'M OH, my life is exciting now. I'm part of the popular group. Look, there's 250 people in her her chat. I'm part of the popular. I'm sitting at the big girls table. I'm I'm a mean girl in high school. Right. That's what that's what that's the energy. Hey, my my friend's here. Hold on one second. >> Hello.
>> Hello. How are you? >> I'm excellent. Especially now that my sexy uh my sexy rapper guy, my white rapper is here. >> I'm trying to be as least offensive as possible with >> Oh, no. You don't offend me. You don't offend me at all. You're my You're my little Pillsbury door boy. >> I'm trying to be what do you call it? A good person.
>> You don't have to be a good person. Just be yourself. But nice person. >> You are a good person. I think you're besides you beating up those lesbians and breaking her toe. I think you're fine. Okay. >> Yeah. But >> you served your time. You served your time. >> I want to ask you a serious question. Can you really hold what someone did a
decade ago against them when they were a Well, I was 20, but technically a teenager. >> I'm I'm I'm joking a little bit with you. Okay. It's a little bit of >> I know. But it it makes me feel But see, I still hold guilt for that. >> Well, you you served your time. You shouldn't. I mean, it's like, you know, and that's good that you have guilt because you shouldn't be beating up lesbians. Okay. >> Psyche. What's up, bro? >> Look, you didn't get your ass beat because lesbians are usually pretty
tough. >> Okay, go ahead. Hey, what's up, Jay Dog? How are you? >> Hey, what's up, bro? Hey, dude. Who's pissing you off today, man? What's going on, man? Is it VA again or is it people of VA? I'm assuming people of VA. It's all these people getting in the middle of it and like it's like and then she and like it's people it's things because said what I didn't like she that's what Tracy said. You heard you hurt people
that I care about that care about you. Okay. Give Okay. Well, what was that supposed to mean though? Like why did she tell you that for like what was she trying? She said that in her chat and then she said and then she was talking about and she's like oh I don't like how he hits on straight guys. Um, hello. I've got exiled ONE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE
HE LOOKS LIKE. I DON'T HAVE BRONZE FOR EXILE. I IT'S A JOKE. It's like I'm just so sick of people like mischaracterizing like I'm sexually harassing these men. They might have a girlfriend. Oh no. You know has a girlfriend sitting right there. She's like, "Hey, come join in the bed." I mean, it's like you're just joking around. Yeah. They can't understand. You're playing around.
You're a character. You know, you're you know joke with each other. Straight guys didn't joke with each other. Gay guys. >> Well, how about remember remember when Bea was joking around with Janet about scissor sisters? Well, nobody said nothing about that. Nobody was saying nothing about that. Tracy, where was Tracy saying about that? >> But the minute you want to joke around, oh wait, it's a straight guy. Oh, he
might have a girlfriend or this or that. But you're just joking like like know what they look like. Let me know what they look like. I mean really I'M HITTING ON AN AVATAR. People are taking this seriously on a streamer show. >> Oh my god. Oh my god. Like up in arms. Hey, look at look at look at that nice
looking guy down there. Hi. Hello, sir. So, hey. Uh yeah, dude. It beta uh I actually just left her stream. She doesn't want to let me. I mean, she lit me up and then she man well you know backstage me >> trying to talk to people and >> did you type did you type f the n-words in the backstage like you do always do
on my show? Okay. That's probably one of the reasons. Okay. >> Yeah. She won't let anybody else go that way. >> But think about what I'm trying to do here. I am trying to change the public perception of that word. I really am. >> Okay. No. No. Please don't. Don't even try. Don't that please don't don't >> that that word that word was designed specifically to hurt people. There's no
way to turn that word around. That word needs that word >> basketball team with like you know >> you don't want to rebrand it. >> No, you can't rebrand it. That's a racist word. You cannot rebrand. >> You can rebrand it because it doesn't have a hardcore sex. >> It doesn't sound good with a southern a white guy with a southern accent saying. >> Exactly. There you go. >> That makes it sound worse. It's not a
very important topic to me. It's like this. >> If you're easily offended that way, I'm probably not going to communicate with you. >> Well, good. I mean, that that's a good thing, too. It's like, you know, we should like if we if someone offends us so much, maybe let's just like get out of their atmosphere. Get out of their >> You just need to you you need to I mean, you could try I've tried to coach people and I've tried to be people's life
coaches on here to try to help. >> MC, let me just say MC, you're pretty insane. Okay. You're insane. Okay, life advice to people. Okay, you beat up your human history. Okay, don't Okay, just don't I mean I I I can be a life coach, too, but it's like for insane people just like you. You could be for insane like someone less insane than us,
right? But there's not that many people. >> I'm insane as long as I have my medication. >> Okay. Okay. No, >> right now I'm medicated. If I was unmedicated, I would agree with you. But since I am medicated with my gabapentin which is anti-convulsory like I will agree with you I am mental but right now I'm not mental because I
have my full faculties on me. >> Okay terminal terminal MC >> you see what I mean? So, like for me, I'm trying to build my life piece by piece. I consider myself kind of like >> judging you. >> If I was in the WWE, right, I would be like the United States Champion. I'm not
saying I'm a main event right now, but I'm working myself up. WWE is a fake. I mean, it's not even a real >> that's a show. It's fake. But when I though, >> but that's how I learned to like kind of talk because my parents would leave the wrestling on uh you know >> and dude I would just pick up a lot of
stuff from >> Who's your favorite wrestler? Your favorite promo >> Hogan Ultimate Warrior or Andre the Giant? There you go. >> No, I didn't start watching wrestling till 2002. >> Oh my god. >> Oh, you're late, bro. You're late. You're hella late. >> Yeah. He started as an adult man. >> And I know my history because I'm a wrestling. >> Wrestling is for like little kids. It's
like for like boy. It's like for little kids. Not for It's for It's for people like Sandman. For people for for kids. >> So you think that? Wait. No. Uh pro wrestling is fake. It's script. >> Yeah, it is. It's fake. It's a TV show. >> But but however, the physical toll that it takes on the body to perform those m >> I know. I know. But it's like it's like it's all rigged and it's like it's just
like silly, you know? It's like all fake. So sports. You think sports is real? You think football's real? >> No, I don't. I think they basketball they probably have magnets in the hoops. I think football is all like magnets. >> Boxing is rigged. Boxing they put weights in the boxing gloves. Yeah. Everything. Yeah. >> Look, is so stupid. I have no idea why
anybody watches basketball. Uh average height of a man is 5 foot n in. And you get these big 7 foot tall players lower the net by a foot and three in and anybody can play goddamn basketball that's athletic. Not everybody, >> but most people would be able to play it.
>> Sports are sports are very inconsequential. Yes, they take some dexterity, but it's like basically at the end of the day, they're a distraction from real life, right? >> Exactly. There you go. Thank you 100% on that. Don't you know that the NFL, they put the Super Bowl to distract you from what's really going on behind the scenes of the world? >> They put that so that way they could
distract the media to distract everybody from what's really going on and and >> the supernatural forces that are behind everything. >> Are you familiar with the >> supernatural >> MC Nemesis? Are you familiar with the term bread and circuses? >> Yes. >> You know where that comes from? ancient Rome where they have the original coliseums which are the original football stadiums
>> which is u okay anybody who enjoys sports I mean anybody who enjoys sports you would say is you would say childish >> no cuz you know gay people like m musicals okay and people are let me be entertained and like but it's like it's not that important I'm saying you don't go oh my god fan of the opera is like a real story it's like no you goant you're
there and then you go home you don't like reason it's not important to you the opera The reason it's not important to you is because you're a broke ass. >> MC Nemesis, can I ask you a question? >> Broke ass. >> I want to ask you a question before. >> Can I ask you one question? How come you shave your mustache and you leave everything else? How come? It's very strange. >> Yeah. Are you Are you Amish? Are you Amish influence?
>> Amish or Muslim? >> No. Amish. Amish. They don't shave strange. It's strange. Look like you're It look like you're albino in in albino. >> Yeah. Why? Why do you shave your musc >> You're not Muslim? You're not Muslim. >> He's not Muslim at all. >> Yeah, I'm a Muslim. That's why this >> How many wives did Muhammad have?
>> Uh, I don't know. But he ra >> Okay, then you're not Muslim. Muslim. Look, I'm just a new Muslim. >> I know you have a Confederate flag. Do you have a Confederate flag in your house somewhere hanging? >> I do this is because I am a No, no. I could do that, too. Look, look at that. See how I I see what you did there, MC
Nemesis. >> The hillbillies. You think you J without a mustache. >> There you go. >> That's what a real hillbilly does. Real hillbillies are Amish. >> Okay. Are >> you okay? >> Okay. My bad. >> Let's talk about I mean, it's like I just Let's get Amish people. Yes. You do look You do look very strange with
>> it. Don't matter the fact if you go to theater or real life. I can teach you how to leave, but not like hardcore. I can just I want >> Not like hardcore. I could just >> Do you want to get Do you want to do a wrestling match with me? We can do a real oil wrestling. >> There you go. There you go. >> Honest with you. What? I really
>> go do a wrestling match. There you go. >> I would like to be the king over people. >> Okay. So, you want to like control people, right? Or be be in charge. >> Why don't you just How about the king of your own house? You don't have to be the king of everybody. How about just have your own house? >> I I do. I do. I have a thing. >> Well, then you're already doing what you want to do. >> I don't want to control other people >> Rule yourself. because >> Well, that's not a good thing to do
>> it is. because >> No, it's not because people are very impressionable and then you they might but they're unpredictable too and so on the right way. >> Right now you have a bunch of beta males in control. I am an alpha male. >> You are not an alpha male. You are a
cappa male. You are cappa male. MC, you are not even a beta. You're a cappa. You're you're a K. >> See, I don't want >> You want to know why I say that? Because I know you smoke. >> Like like I'm better. You smoke a lot of special. >> I'm better than you. I'm saying alpha males are not like going to be like I
want to get by a guy in front of my wife. I mean, it's like nemesis. You are not an alpha male. You are not an alpha male. MC Nemesis, listen. >> You are a kappa male. You're also alpha males don't hit women. They don't they don't >> Oh, yeah. Most alpha males protect women. They protect women and they don't kidnap women. They protect women and
children. And then they they protect their loved ones. They protect >> they protect everybody. I'm 32 now. So, >> it don't matter what age you were, you still did it. You still did it. is as hell. >> All right. Wait a minute. If I if I unal alive somebody if I unal alive somebody when I was pointing does that make it >> It's as hell. Like it doesn't different now?
even I'm not saying that because it angers me. It does. It really I'm saying that >> your medications were really working. >> 20y old version of me >> and now I'm in the 32y old version. You see? >> Okay. So you were a 20-year-old version. Now you're a 32-y old version. The 32year-old version of me is
>> and performs as an alpha should. >> You're not an alpha though, MC Nemesis. You're not psyching an alpha. >> I'm an alpha. You're not an alpha. You're not an alpha. >> I want to know your reasons, dumbass. >> And I'm telling you, you hit women. You Answer. kidnapped a woman. You hit children. You
you you Yeah. You hit lebians. You you you hate against gay people. You do all kinds of things that are not an >> You can't judge. Okay. alpha male. >> You are not You are not becoming of an alpha male. >> You are not becoming of an alpha male. >> It's not as good as Hulk Kogan when he was 35. You godamn idiot.
>> I'm not an idiot, but I don't know. His real name is Terry. Okay, you know Hulk's real name is Terry. He has a wife and kids and he's a real guy. LIKE, HEY, BROTHER. Like >> are you guys listening to me at all? >> Yeah, we are. But it's silly. >> Okay. Now, do you understand what I said? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Don't. Okay. Now, when I ask you the
reasons why you think that I would not qualify to be an alpha, you keep going back to the same goddamn point >> because you get it. Because you can't erase it. You have to go stupid. >> It don't matter what age. Okay. Wait a minute. In fact, if I unal alive somebody, if I unal alive somebody when I'm 20, it still affects me till they're dead.
>> Talk about it when they're 32. >> Okay, there's a lot of people who aren't alive people in prison. >> When they were years ago, but they're still paying for it because they didn't not develop. Mine's not developed. >> I'll give you that. >> I come from a broken home, so give me some
my life. Give me that. came from a broken home. So that gives you excuses to go around and beat women. >> no. out of here with that >> That that that does not condone. >> I don't condone a woman period. You know, scum a scum a put hands on a woman. That's to keep a woman out of his
house. But you kidnapped a woman. You hit lebians. You You've done some crazy MC Nemesis. You're I'm not telling you what to do. It's like it's like people are going to judge if you have if you keep >> saying it over and over again >> because you did it. You did it. That's why if you didn't do it then I wouldn't bring it up that I did it.
>> You know what I like I would like if you were out like how you changed and how you like if you're out saying hey I did this and it's like and I regret this and I you and telling people never to do it and learn from my mistake. That's like >> putting making it positive. But you're like you didn't do any of that. I mean you like you uh >> he's bragging about it. He's bragging about it. >> He said that I'm a different person.
Okay. >> Okay. But you're condoning what you did. Why don't you don't take responsibility. You don't say, "Hey, you know what?" And psyche, you're right. I made bad decisions back then. I shouldn't have did it. >> can you mute this >> He's in a hard er, bro. this guy using the hard er.
>> Yeah, bro. >> I mean that and he knew he was trying to get himself kicked off. So, which is great. Okay. >> And alpha males like like I mean it's like people they don't need to, you know, use racial language and like alpha alpha male basically is like someone that's just like confident in
themsel not not to have to put down other people. They they just work on themselves. I'm more of like a I have maybe some a little I have all I have energy of all the all at any time and there's different aspects of my personality and that's the same for a lot of people but basically like you know I'm basically a sigma like what is
it like a lone wolf kind of attitude like I'm I'm a loner I'm I'm I'm a I'm a used to being very alone and so I don't like these >> Well you're one of those ones like I I noticed like you're you're one of the ones where you could go in any crowd and kick it with anybody. Like, >> you can go with the homeboy, you can go >> yeah,
with the the the picker, you can go >> if I prison, I get along with the guards and the cops, you know, I got I get along with everybody. >> Yeah. Yeah. Like you could you could go anywhere like like Yeah. Yeah. you don't have. >> It's not like it's not like I'm changing myself, but I'm I'm always myself and it's like but myself in a way that's not
hateful or like antagonistic to everybody to the whole group or especially to the race races or or gender. But I guess you know women um are like a lot of women are mad because it's like you know we have beta and Tracy oh my god it's like it's like and it's like people are like oh my god you thing people don't realize they have parts in this too that are not perfect. Okay. And I'm not going to go out and say every like little
thing they're doing wrong like they're doing to me, right? Cuz that's like I don't but I'm just saying no. Nobody's perfect. And it's like people just jump on these wagons like there's so many people that are over there um that were once over here and I have no idea why they hate me now because they're once my friends. But it's just like they heard something or um people or there's enough people said something
that it's like oh my god. Some people most people are just followers. It's sad to say. Okay. >> Yeah. who they are, bro. They what they do is they let people get into their head. Either it's Beta or Friends of Beta get into their heads and put in their heads that's not true about you and then it makes them think differently and look differently upon you. And then they're like, "Oh, well, we'll just believe Beeta because, you know, she has
this cute little voice or she has this little cute little this or or she sounds like a little girl, so we'll believe her." Even though it's annoying as Her voice is annoying as She's annoying as But, >> right. >> But then again, I'm annoying, too. Like I'm not going to say I have an annoying >> We all have our I mean I can be annoying moment. too. We all have our moments, right? But and it's like but I've talked to people
and I've said, "Hey, well be and they go right into well she's perfect. Like she she's the greatest person in the world, so you must have done something really bad." And it's like you're fine. >> You've done so much wrong, bro. Where? Okay, that that's what I get upset about. So when the does Beta and Sandman get dictate the panel verse
rules as far as Oh. They set the standards. Why do they set the standards? Who are they? Are they God? Are they talking? This is not high school. This is like her 30s, 40s, 50s. I mean, she's in her 50s. I mean, I mean, god dang. Like, high school was 30 years ago, lady. Like, get over it. Okay, >> dude. You graduated in 1993. Dude, I
graduated 2003. >> I graduated 999. I mean, it's like But I'm not trying to be back in high school. I'm not I'm not like >> No, I know, bro. I know. >> I do. She's annoying, bro. Especially when she gets the people riled up against you. Especially people like like who's the latest one? I know you've been saying Tracy a lot and I've been hearing KZ going a lot back and forth with Tracy
a lot. I remember she used to be over here with Michael anybody thing that thing that is. So I said something I said beat's name one night. Don't mention her name. You're doing this. You're doing okay. I was like well okay I'm allowed to say whatever I want then you can say whatever you want to say. They're smiling like he's like
>> oh plus another annoyed me with what he said. He's okay. So um Exile one was like hey you know I don't care if y'all send people to my house. I'll just I'll give them my scramble. I'll get some money first. Or and if I if they're looking for a drug dealer, I probably got one in there. If they're looking for some guy to their wife, I probably got one in here. I mean he's like I like Okay. Yeah. Do you have people banging
at your at your door and like you know you're like maybe a on a farm or something. So you have someone banging at your door at 6:00 in the morning or all through the day or trying to open your door and like coming and being told, "Oh, come inside." How would you feel about that? Like you know thing that is like, "Oh, you're turning lemons to lemonade, right?" Like I'm not I'm not like having a good attitude. I'm nice to these people that come to the door.
Dude, if you wanted to, you could be like some people who go out there like with a gun and like that and act crazy and, you know, have cops and create an entire, you know, a scene, but you don't. You You just tell them, "Oh, sorry." You know, prank. And then you wish them good luck on the way out. Well, hope you get to keep it. Sorry about that. Or >> at the end of the day, it's not their fault. They're victims, too, because they're being told there's nothing free.
They're there's an ad in some Craigslist or on the internet. Um, and they're being and it's because this mentally ill, um, you know, ally master computer. I mean, he's he's definitely mentally ill. I mean, >> no, dude. He was, dude, that he got fired from being a mailman. He used to be a mailman. >> Mailman. Mail men are crazy. Like a lot of mailmen like, you know, have
>> he used to be a mailman and he had under his basement, he had this entire layout of like these HO model train sets and like layouts. >> That is creepy. And what adult plays with train? for >> bro. That's what he would do with his money. He's crazy. I don't know. Musical Marty made a fool out of him. >> Collection or something. I mean, it's like what the hell?
>> Yeah, dude. He's crazy, bro. He's cra, dude. His mom's on only. >> Yeah. I mean, I feel bad for him in a way, but it's like I know he's like seriously mentally ill. Like seriously. >> Yeah, he he is. He does have autism. >> Yeah. But I mean, no, no, autism is not not mentally I mean, it's like I'm
talking about he's like like rapidly upset. Like he's always here. He's in here right now, too. And he's like and then he text me. He text me calling me a fake Jew. And then he text me saying I'm anti-Semitic. I mean, SO WHAT THE IS IT? It's like in the same two like the same two texts. It's like, >> dude, that's like that's like calling a black person the n word and then saying
you're racist. >> It's like, okay, I'm some nut. like you can't reason with crazy, you >> Yeah, I know. >> put him on get him on back on medication. MC Nemesis was pretty good on his medication, you know. But he started to lose at the end though. He's starting to get mad. >> Yeah. Yeah. It all started to wear off a little bit, but you know what?
But but it's okay, you know? It's like and I don't want to like not trying to make light of anybody's anybody's mental, you know, we all have our little >> Oh, we all have some type of mental illness, dude. I have PTSD and probably other that I don't even know about. >> And sometimes my behavior, guys, you ever realize I've been through so much narcissistic abuse, like so much
narcissistic abuse and mind so much that maybe my behavior isn't always completely rational because it's like I've been brain a lot in a certain ways and it's like I I have problems trusting people and I also love people in a way. So, it's like I can't I can't it's like impossible for me to hate people, which I consider as kind of a mental disorder because I should be
able to have a healthy hate for some people, but they have a hate for me, but I don't. I I like have this like weird thing where it's like, oh, I feel sorry for them. I love I want to, you know, I I just I have sympathy and and I feel empathy. But that's what they a lot of these narcissists will feed on, my empathy. Because, you know what? I I came in this community thinking, hey,
I'm one of the pretty like chill like nicest guys here. Like I don't like >> everybody up everybody's welcome. Yeah. >> Right. And it's like that as like some kind of like evil bad like I mean and then then will put that comment on the screen. Psyche's evil then put that on the screen. That's >> you should put that as her title, bro.
She put that as a title, bro. I'm like what the hell, bro? But then she gets mad when other people put her in the title. Oh, you're doxing. You're doing this. You're doing that. Like what? >> I don't attack her personally. I don't I I like I will go after her for what she says about me and stuff, but I don't say, "Oh, I don't I don't say anything about her personal life." She goes, "Light. I got a call. Hold on."
>> She goes after my uh my business. Oh, you're making money like this. You're making money like this. Oh, wait. Oh, you you're so greedy. You're just about fish tacos and dick. And I mean, it's like these are all these narratives that are is just so annoying. It's like, no, I'm not. I'm like actually like a chill person. I'm actually not. I mean I I mean yeah sometimes if I'm a little low
on cash and stuff like that and I'm like hungry and like I mean people are being told oh you're gay if you donate to him or you're like this and that and it's like and then she's saying oh I'm terrible at tarot go to go see sweet pee and and her ex-boyfriend Carl and and Paige instead. Yeah. It's and his psyches a charlan a grifter. He doesn't
know. And then exile is making up story. Oh, you know, I talked to Bronze Bird's girlfriend who I want to have on the show and I question about this because I I want to exactly what she said because I I uh I never did not know Tarot as long as I've been on the show. I mean, it's like I've known Tar I was eight years old and so it's just complete Plus, I wasn't He's like, "Oh, well, it was from a few years ago. You
were on the other tarot readers program. I wasn't on anybody's program a few years ago." I mean, it's like just making up and but people will believe it. Okay. Well, people were as I don't care. people believe anything. I don't know. I got all riled up because sick of it. I'm sick of it. And I've And
I'm Christine, you're He's stalking Beta. All cap letters. He's stalking Beeta. How am I stalking her? And by the way, how do you stalk like one of the biggest gangstalkers in California? I don't understand. It's like right. Anyway, how do you stalk a stalker? I mean, that's that that's a if I can do that,
that'd be amazing. I don't I don't have I don't have time to sit and take a thousand screenshots of everything and and send them to everywhere and and try to black people all this kind of porn. I DON'T HAVE time trying to live my own life. Jesus Christ. >> See what's going on. Hey, Apollo.
What's going on in the chat? Oh, hold on. I need my glasses. I need my I need my Oh, I need my spectacles here. Okay, what's going on? Okay, Arthur's doing it. Yeah. Well, I mean, I saw Arthur doing it, but Arth I mean Arthur is kind of like I think it's a little bit um it's kind
of like trying to sort of but that's part of the community, too. And it's like but I don't want to talk about trivia all day or you know I mean I do like some of the interesting drama but it's like I don't but you know and sometimes it's interesting hear what people say but Patrick you didn't lose your wrench. Why would you say you lost your wrench? You lost your wrench because this is a new
channel Patrick. Come on. Don't jump to conclusions my friend. Okay. It's a new channel right? Oh yeah. Hold on. Yeah. See there's Arthur. I I don't mind Arthur. Like I he was being very cordial to be then she's bringing up his his his girlfriend and stuff and it's like right I mean it's like she's not a part of the panel. I mean it's like he was like you know he shared a picture of her hand.
Does that mean he wants her brought up all the time? I mean Jesus Christ. Okay. What's going on? MC Nemesis is saying Jay trolls me the moment I troll back. I'm kicked. I Well, because you started saying the N word um with a hard R and I just thought a look in your eyes. Okay. Okay, I'm sorry, guys. I'm on fire right
now. No, it's not only her. It's like she's not affect Okay, it's not her. Okay, it's so many things. So many things right now. It's It's not Okay, it was just I would love if it was just her effect. It was just like, oh, so this is me and her relationship and she's driving. No, no, it's all these people she she she um brings up a lot of
people, 50, 100 people. No, it's like um getting all this like all these lies. Okay, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's Yeah. And it's like and then it's like but I get all the blame. It's like and I'm the bad person. Okay. And it's like and I was really I go try to be I'm not trying to be I am
loving and it's like I get pulled out of my character and right? It's a snowball effect. It's like and and that's why I'm sick of all these people involved. It's like and people come back back and forth. I don't believe like I can tell when people are trying to stir me up and like get me to talk about her and stuff like that. Like when like our kind of did the other night, he's like, "Oh, well she said that you're friends again." I was like, "No, I didn't talk to her and you're mistaken and stuff
like that. I don't think she would say that." Maybe he was trying to get me to like to say something. I don't I don't know. But um basically, okay, but okay. I got out a lot of I got out a lot of stuff right there. Okay. There's a lot of It's It's like guys, it's like seriously I've been through a lot of this
gaslighting where it's like I'm being abused and then I'm being told that I'm the abusive one. And then I can I constantly am looking to see what did I do? What did I what am I doing wrong? Like am I am I? And then it's like then I like we'll get some clarity and especially when people like Alexandra will say like they'll shut she'll point up a mirror. Okay. And I'll be like and
then I'll see myself in the mirror smiling and I'll be like well well that's not that monster and like that's a nice person. I mean it's like so when people can see me and like I want this like you saying that too. It's like wow somebody that kind of like gets it. You know this is even Kate when Kate was like you know Psyche's being
treated unfairly. you know, Kate Kate wasn't my biggest supporter, but she see, you know, she sees I mean, it's like so when people are honest, I really like that, right? Not that it's just on my side because we disagree about all kinds of things, but and I'm not like I'm not saying I'm I'm not saying I'm just a victim, right? Because it's like and I've gone back and forth and I've
been passive aggressive too, right? And I I have unmoded but it's like really there's so many people trying to start startup and then it's like oh you know what I was told yesterday you know guys you know do you guys know Pyana? Does anybody know Pyon? I want to tell you what she said to me yesterday. I want to tell you the story. Anybody know Pyana? Hi. Hi. Uh
no it was not me. No I did not talk. I did not I I looked at her chat today. I was in for like cuz ghost told me to go over there for a few minutes but I did not because he told me that somebody was trying to get on. I am not redon beach cat strangler. I do not talk in her chat. I have not talked in her chat or communicate with her at all since she told me do not talk to me. Okay. And so that was it. Not not one time. Okay. But
I'm allowed to like go especially if the chats, you know, they're chatting about me. I go in there and they're talking about me. Okay. So anyway, that was not me. Yes, you're backstage. Okay. Hold on one second. Hi.
>> Just one second real quick. >> Hi. I know. I I know. I know. Avana, but it's like it gets a little bit it's getting a little I mean it's like to the point Avana like this guy that she the guy that has doxed her and doxed me is telling people to he's like, "Oh, come on." inside the doors open and stuff and
people are actually trying to come inside my house like opening my door all times of the day weeks and weeks and he's like stop harassing VA and blah blah and I'm not doing anything right and then Christine he's stalking VA okay so it's like now it's like I'm being accused of really crazy things and they're doing they're basically doing it to me and then they're laughing because it's like people think I'm doing something and they're doing it like it's likeical gaslighting right okay
I mean it's crazy making right it's just like I'm just trying to trying to shine a light on some of this the truth. Okay, guys. I am about truth. I am about truth. Okay, >> I'm with it. I'm with it. >> I will take >> for my part of things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And then again, that's what annoyed me thing that is is like, you know, not necessarily like I mean I mean you
didn't really annoy me, but it was EXILED SAYING, "OH, YEAH. WELL, I just come on over. I'LL GIVE YOU SCRAP METAL." WELL, I DON'T HAVE ANY SCRAP METAL TO GIVE YOU. OKAY. I don't have any scrap metal, so it's annoying. Okay. And my neighbors are complaining and it's scary. They're trying to open the door all the all all hours of the day. He's telling them, "Oh, my father's inside sleeping or knock really loud. I have a big metal door." All the neighbors are.
It's like it's really >> so crazy ads and all these things. I mean, it's like >> and then nobody cares and then they're like, "Oh, what happens to me?" >> Pet had a little like a UPS drop off a a rat in the bag from Petco and and it's like and she's still screaming about that. And that happens TO ME EVERY DAY. OKAY. I mean,
>> Psyche. I care because I I called it Sorry. out. I always called it out. You know that. >> Yeah. And I I do think you're honest. And it's like you're not you don't do anything wrong by going like questioning people because it's like people can answer or not or choose to talk to you or not. It's like I mean it's like they don't I mean it's you're you're not like if you had a show it would be more of like then you can then you could maybe
go out you know say oh you know more about more personal stuff but you don't you're just on the phone as a caller as like a casual participator in the community not as like going and trying to dox people and doing all this stuff. >> Thank you. Exactly. Thank you. Thank you. Look, I'm guys and it's like I'm sorry I'm like getting it's so frust It's really frustrating
because I'm like sitting here like I feel like so alone like most of the time like I and it's like I gotten to the point where even the people that like love me I'm like I now I I'm like I question it because it's like everybody else and I'm just expecting everyone to like hate me and like leave me and I'm like I'm very skeptical if anyone even likes me and I'm like I when I have 40 people in here and no one's talking to me it's like they're just sitting and
watching me. I don't It's like I don't want to just be sat and watched. I want to be like I want to talk and like have a conversation. I don't want to like just be looked at. I'm not like some kind of like freak in a cage. Um but uh yeah, and now then I then I of course like you know get upset and then like now I'm doing exactly what you know they want me to do and like look look crazy
or whatever. But you know what? I'm just going to be me. I'm just going to be me. And it's like uh but I'm not hurting anybody, okay? And I don't go after people. I don't try to hurt people. >> You don't go real life. >> No, never. And it's like and but nobody cares. It's don't they'll go real life with me, you know? It's like they'll go real life with me. And then it's like and even some of the things that are
said about are just like talk about passive aggressive. How about bringing up like >> passive aggressive, >> right? It's hurtful. Um, >> you earlier on panel with her like she's bringing up my wife and then she go like, "Well, you talked about my cat five years ago." It's like,
>> "Right, it's like I I'm so sick of like this this okay tit for tat kind of thing." It's like, >> exactly. >> How about we all How about we just like say, "Hey, that both that's both both that it's wrong and let's not do that to each other and let's not >> just move on." >> Yeah. Why can't we do that? No, it has to be like let's draw it out. let me she'll like name lives after me reading
private messages I sent to somebody else which I probably knew that the person would share because that you know I know that person can't help himself because oh I have something for beta oh she'll think I'm interesting or something like that right just run to queen beta right like she's like oh like some kind of you know holy figure of this community this is not prom king and queen like I Sam and beta are not prom king and king there's
another couple streamers in this you know we're all we're all pretty small streamers. When it comes down to the mutual world, we all we all go through some of the same though. We should maybe like have empathy for each other instead of attacking each other. Okay, you >> preach, brother. Preach. >> Yo, what's up, Psyche? My bad, bro. I I got a call. I
take real quick. >> Oh Indian dude. >> Indian? No, I'm not Indian. Arthur, you know who I am. Arthur, >> I forgot your name. Um, hold on. Let me look at the screen. Yes. Yes. Almost there. Yes. >> Mrs. Sassy >> Pig I don't think that's the real
sassy Scarlet. I don't think she that would be her name. >> I don't think I don't think she takes links. I've never seen her take a link >> No, I don't think so. And then there's before. not It's not She's commenting in the chat saying, "Oh, okay. Maybe your panel first better." Some guard. Well, you know what? How about I How about I worry about my panel and then you worry about sitting in the chat
talking. Okay. I I can run my show. Okay. It's not classy sassy. Classy cat sassy would not call herself pig Okay. I know that. >> Correct. >> I just there's a little common sense I picked up along the way of my >> So is are they live over there right now on the other side where >> Vas? >> Yeah. >> Well, I don't know if they are. I like
like over an hour ago. >> She's not I just checked. She's not. She's listening right now. She's not listening. >> Okay. Okay. Well, listen. you. You stupid You want to say, "Bro, you know what she said, bro?" She said, "Oh, dude, she was making up this saying I was talking about the massage parlor for 30 bucks." First of all, it cost more than 30 bucks for a massage parlor. Second of all, I never went to
the massage parlor. Well, I was married at all. She tried to say I was going out on stepping out on my wife when I was married and going to the massage parlor and oh how dare I feel bad for that massage lady. Look in his face. Bea, have you ever looked in the mirror? There's a reason you don't cam up. Me? I I'm ugly. Yeah, I don't give a But I'm not scared to cam up. I don't give a
about I'm comfortable with who I am. I don't give a Veto, you will not cam up. You will not c up. >> I'm sorry, man. I just want to apologize if I snap at people like unfairly. Like I I am in a I'm a little bit >> built up built up. >> Yeah, there's a lot of stuff coming out right now and then I see like there's a
confusing stuff and it's like I really have been mind where it's like I don't know who to trust sometimes or like or take things the wrong way. Yeah. So, I'm sorry if I if I snap at you unfairly, you know, just like, you know, just understand I'm going through. >> You're only human, dude. You're only human. >> It happens, man. Don't worry about it. >> You're only humans. Beat, if you're listening, I have no hate against you. I
don't know why you have to constantly bring up the past. Like you said earlier, you know, I gave you so many chances and opportunities, but you keep bringing this stuff up and it bothers you. I'm not talking about any of that >> This all started with you, man. All this stuff. all in all reality, man, this started with you. The stuff, the drama with Psyche, the the the fighting, like all
this started with with the uncle bro. >> >> She be mad. >> This is the thing though. This is the thing though. >> She has >> I said it. Why is it towards Psyche? Psyche never said or >> I I know she took it out on him. She took it out. >> Exactly. So she was never She was never mad at you about it. She was always mad at me about it.
>> You go, bro. >> That makes no sense. >> Yeah. She was always mad at me about it. And I was always like, "Well, I ke" and I remember that day I kicked you off the show like immediately. Yeah, >> I did. And then then and then she was and then oh my god, he's your you were my mod at the time or something like or I don't know. But I mean it's like I don't care who's the mod or not. She has people mods I don't like and they hate
me. Do I tell her a new mod or not? No. I don't try to micromanage her show. Why would she try to micromanage my show so much? Right. >> She tries to run your show, bro. She tried to run your show. >> Can I ask you for a huge favor, dude? >> What's up? >> She's obviously going to be live. Can you join her panel and can you just both of you just talk it out? >> I would love to, but I um you know Okay, so first of all, I have to go over
there. So, it's me having to go over there and and I we need to go in on neutral territory and not like man's really or we just have to work it out on our own. But it's really like there's so it's like she's like, "Oh, well, he's hurt all these people." That's what Tracy That's what that was Tracy's like. Oh, you've hurt people that care about
you. And also I care about Oh, okay. Obvious. Okay. So, why would I do that? Like if someone is that there must have been a reason that they're if I had modded them, if I kicked them out of the chat if I usually seriously it might be about kicking someone off stage for 20 seconds and they're still mad about it, right? That's right. >> You remember Allied Master Computer? He
she said hello to him first thing. Oh, she says it all. Oh, what did she say? Oh hi. >> Yep. And he docked her. Okay. He like RG docks her too. And she she blames that on me. He never like RG never docks me, but he docks her and he's her mod. Okay. >> Yep. Yep. Yep. But she blames me for doxing her even though I just doxed her phone number. That's the only thing I
>> Also, can we can we say again like she do. has said her name um several times on the air. I mean, it's like her full name. She even said it like that like recently. Yeah. And so it's not doxing when the information's out there from the person already. I mean, really, I can't I can't do >> my name's out there. I've said my name.
>> For the record, I've never doxed her, but Jay Dog just said that he has her put out her phone number earlier. She said that I'm literally worse than Jay Dog. And I've never doxed her for the record. >> For the record. >> Well, she said that earlier. She said that Arthur was worse than Jay Dog. >> I am worse than you apparently. And mind Okay. you, I've never put out her full name.
Never said her name. I've never said her phone number. And apparently I'm >> She said that. Why did she say that? What was the topic about why she was talking about you when >> she was just trying to tell other people that I'm the biggest POS around, >> right? And that's what she'll do to people. And it's like, you know, was actually a really nice guy. Like I know he annoys some people, whatever, but
it's like >> ultimately he's a little bit of a stir and like a little bit like you know maybe he's a little more innocent than he is but he's not a mean-hearted person or like >> evil. >> Yeah, he's not evil and neither am I. >> Ran into Arthur over there on Zas and Sandman. That's where I first seen him. >> And I didn't I didn't call I didn't say
to Tracy that Bea was evil. Well, I said to Tracy that um VA told me basically to go unal alive myself when I had expressed, you know, desperate feelings. >> Okay. Can you expl Arthur? Did you hear about that? >> When Yeah. >> You heard about when she told him when Psyche was going through a bad time and, you know, wasn't feeling well. >> He reached out to a friend, you know,
hoping to get some kind of, you know, comfort and, >> you know, guidance. >> I'm going to expose all these messages and show what you really are like. And then Yeah. And then um and then she's like, >> "Oh, she put those out." >> Just do it. Just do it. Right. >> She dropped them. She got DMs. >> Yeah. >> No, no, no, no. She did it. She said she >> Oh, okay. I thought she did. I was like, would.
"Dude, what the hell?" >> No. No. >> She would. >> Wait. Yeah. But it's like Yeah. And but honestly, I don't want to I don't think I don't even think I have person like Have I personally attacked her? No. Um, but I yeah, I did tell Tracy like because Tracy was like, "Oh, you know, oh, be Oh, she's just like kissing. It's
just a butt kissing." And it's like, and I Oh, God. It's like I don't know. It just seems like it's like >> Yeah. She's something else. I'm telling >> We know she's listening right now. Why you. can't she just join Pan Bea, please? >> Yeah. She's She's out there. She's just going to come on and say, >> "Oh, I don't like that." What is she gonna say voice? She'll come on. She
comes on, she'll she'll talk about some some unrelated topic and that's all she'll want to talk about and then that will be it and then she'll or that or that or she'll be start crying and everyone will get sympathy and including me and then she'll say something like I wrote this poem about you about how to love you from afar and then the next day she'll say that wasn't about you sick weirdo. How do you >> I remember that. I she tried to backtrack that.
>> She put it on a post and then she dedicated it to you saying this was about psyche >> and then she tried to say the next day, oh that wasn't about you and you you so conceited if you thought that was about you boyfriend. Well, why did you tell me just yesterday and it's on um on Rumble on uh Trip and Sip or um you know Panel?
No, it's on on Trip Kicks. You can see her saying I posted that about you. Okay. So, I mean, sorry to make fun of her Minnie Mouse voice, but it's like it's just kind of >> Hey yo, >> that's the worst thing I've done to make fun of her, but she does have a cute voice. >> I don't know if it's even a real voice. I don't I've never heard a woman with a voice like that, you know, that wasn't like, you know, you know, 15 years old.
I don't know. I don't know. But >> yeah, you hold right. I'll be right back. >> Okay. That that wasn't like sucking on Julian balloons. I've never heard I heard anybody like a voice like that, but Okay. We wish we had a voice like that. It's It's almost like Michael Jackson, you know, Michael Jackson. Hi, Michael Jackson. And then it's like in real life he actually like had like a man's voice, you know, like a regular
voice because he was like, you know, black man like but he you think that was his real voice. Hi, you know, it's like no, it's like a little bit of a put on. I don't know why. I don't know why. Just maybe her voice is like this. I don't No, I don't want I don't want to make fun of I'm sorry.
See, I I don't want to get mean, guys. I am like and I I can have a sharp tongue, but I say is like nothing. Like I seriously I there's so much I can be so much worse. I'm very very like, "Hey, Jamie, how are you, sweetheart?"
Yeah. Well, that I do I do think that some of that is some of that is um you know urban legend uh oh hold on to that that I don't know I I just don't know. Okay, you know you know he was weird on his own without even without
without his father. I don't know if he had a chemically cast. I mean, that's just seems like a very very extreme h to keep his voice like that. And plus, it's like it's like the castrado like they the castrado in a in uh like the the Vatican or whatever and they would like be these like boys that beautiful um vbratto voice or whatever
and then it's like they would want to change and so but then it's like if you if you hear back the adults that have they they sound really weird. Okay. Yeah. You hear in the documentary? Yeah. I just I mean it's like you don't even know what to believe about Michael Jackson. There's a lot of stuff said about him. Like he he bought the Elephant Man's Bones. He was dating like Bubbles. He was dating Emanuel Lewis. He was, you know, he's dating Brook
Shields. He's dating Elvis Presley's. I mean, it's just too weird. It gets too weird, right? Yeah. I don't I just I It just seems like it's like one of those like Marilyn Manson took out his ribs so he could suck his own dick kind of stories, right? I know. I know he he was like probably probably overworked and and maybe like beat so he could like you know go get out there and sing and play do all these tours and
like you know don't have a childhood. I understand all that. Yeah. But I I don't know if he's going to say hey I'm I'm going to like make it so he could never have kids and and he's going to be like so kind of weird looking freak. I don't think his father wanted him to be like the Michael he was even though even if he was rich, you know, pretty like famous and stuff. I don't know if like people would create that. I mean I guess
it's possible. I just don't know. I just don't know. Okay. You know what? And it's like now I'm done. It's like I just feel and then like I I was like, you know, then Summer was yelling at me this morning just cuz I said Christine's name. I didn't even say anything really about I didn't say anything negative. I just said, "Oh, Crystal Maria's on the show the other
day. How can you bring?" But then Summer's sitting there on on Bronzeber's panel. They're talking all this about me. Doesn't say anything. maybe doesn't say anything about necessarily too bad about me, but she doesn't so she says, "DON'T TALK ABOUT IT." YOU KNOW, IT'S like she just goes off on me like you. Okay. So, it's okay to go off on me. Okay. Right.
I'm always It's always me. It's always me. It's always my fault, right? It's always my fault. I don't like to be screamed at like that. like and I didn't even know because I was you if you can see the expression on my face when that happens it's like what the o like oops obviously I didn't I'm not trying to get her to to scream at me it's not a comfortable
thing it's like if you know it triggers back childhood you know being yelled at and stuff like that and it's not it's like not a good feeling and it's like I'm always trying to like be a kind of a peacekeeper or like a maybe maybe comedian to like keep the keep everything light and it's like so when things get like serious and like scary and It's like it's just it's I I feel
negative energy like really strongly. It's part of the thing about of my my astrology or it's just like I I'm I can transmute a lot of negative energy but I feel it really strongly. Okay. And it's like and I and I'm sensitive. I am sensitive but it's like wow I really had to toughen up since if
you saw how sensitive I was when I got in this community compared to how I am now. I mean, yeah, I'm kind of like, you know, overreacting a little bit right now, I guess. I don't know. Sometimes you just got to get your feeling. And it's, you know what, and a lot of you I do like really appreciate just like you. I know you guys a lot of you understand, okay? Because there's so many people that won't even come. They'll if they
come here, they'll just be either a horrible troll or they'll just sit here and just like wait for me to say something that they can report on, okay? Like I don't know. It's not like there's even anybody here. Like 12 people see and it's like look but you know 12. That's it. Then my channel gets
taken. Oh, you know people are celebrating and like laughing and laughing and I get back. I bet I had it back up the same I'm fine. I'm a fighter and then it's like I'm like yeah my channel's still doing fine. I'm still still making money. Oh HK Oh that's all you care about is money. money. It's like shut up I mean There you go with the Jesus Christ. What? What is it your business? It's my business. Call it's
called a business. You want to be you want to have someone tell you know pick outside picking your work or something like that. I mean gez mind your own business. And people who donate to me doesn't none of anybody's business right. Donators constantly getting harassed. People afraid to donate. People being
being um you know mocked and and it's like Yeah. It's turning turning into something where it's like what? You just want to have me starve to death. I'm sure some people would love that, right? And then it's like if I get too skinny, oh my god, now he's right. But nobody's been talking. Everyone's gone. Like nobody even cares about me anymore. Like that's how that's
where we got to. I think I cowboys and uh you know that's about it. You know, Alexandra and uh you know I do have I do have I'm sorry if like I'm I'm like exaggerating. I do have some very good people around me. But slowly those are being chipped away at too right?
I wish I could have a like that's why I love Alexander because I know we're we're like we're strong and she understands. She sees what's going on. So we're it's like we I'm just we're not just gonna turn on each other like you know but the amount of times I'm just turned on right I'm just like and then discard like do you understand you understand the discard is not because oh well you
know he's being it's like discards happen in this narcissistic abuse situations. We have a good we have a good crew here. I'm I'm saying yeah you and Ivana you're the only ones here. I'm not trying to insult anybody. I'm saying literally there's eight people in the chat. Like nobody's here. Like nobody. They like some people they probably went over went over to see beat on bloggers
and stuff like that. They don't people don't care about me anymore. They just want to see they want to see me uh you know get get upset and then they want to go go and uh tell her everything I said. Right. That's all in the report. Right. I'm saying Jamie I do have a good crew. you Abana
is there's if there you know Alexandra of course you know are there is there more let me know if there's more I mean I like that you know some of the CFF people too I mean they're on their own I mean it's kind of a different thing it's just like everybody but it's like you know nobody wants nobody likes me anymore you know nobody I do you notice like nobody gets readings from me um people just believe
I'm a grifter that I'm Like you know how talented I am. Do you know how talented I am at? Like that's actually like the one of the only things I'm good at and one of the only things I take pride in is that I'm good at is just my intuition and being able to read people, you know, no one even cares anymore. They just think I'm just some joke. So, um, you know,
so whatever. I don't know. I'll I'll sit here like, you know, like nobody here. I mean, you you guys are and I appreciate you guys being here. Thank you. It'd be really if I was sitting here alone yelling, that'd be
really hard. And I'm sorry if I Sorry if I didn't mention anybody that that is a friend and stuff like that. It's just like I'm just I'm frustrated. I'm sorry, guys. I'm gonna I'm gonna end this stream because, you know, nobody nobody cares anyway. But I love you. Thank you so much for
>> >> line up in the world and I'm half poison on sweet spirits fair warning. But I still try to stay in your orbit, but you'd already carve your exit room.
Throw a feast for my ghost. Life bends to the wilder names it. I w your faith on myself. Kiss my daughter good night and sprinting through the dust like a runaway man. Yeah. run everything, especially the truth that glare too
bright. When the sun drops sideways into your eyes, you reach for my heart only when I'm walking away. Classic new year, new skin, same old river dragging us to the same
damn sea. People mow hearted weary ride a famous mist dry. They told me I should feel lucky to belong to anyone. The prophecy tasted wrong. All the time I spent all the mass war you closer and blur the vision till I can't tell if it's love or just the echo
of it. But the credit hits again that evening some blindness. You want my devotion only in the moment my footprint fades. Leaving means leaving. No relics on the altar. No echoes in the temple hall. Just us.
Night swimming, pupils glowing white. Summer drinks lying sweeter than the makers. You slip through versions of yourself, searching for a torch freedom. Love is a blade that teaches release one cut at a time.
>>
>> And still the sun in your eyes. There is when I turn to go. Nothing behind you but the shadow you cast as you walk away from everything.
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
I I carve my name into silence, ditch my ribs with smoke, build altars out of every word I never spoke. broke. My mercy was the wound that never healed.
And I keep reopening it just to feel. You came bleeding stories beg for a shrine, but I can't be your savior. When I'm crossing my own line, I unseal the heart.
I let it burn. Everything is how the soul returns. Every sky got sacred seal. I open the wound to know what's real.
I wish for you once against the council of my bones. Watched you slip into the black where the current own. You never felt the pull beneath your skin. So I held out
bloodless fingers waiting for you to swim. Mercy is a quiet ritual I keep inside my throat to light the candle's gutter. This is where we both let go. I pry my chest open, stitch it shut with moonlight thread. My
weakness is the way I keep the living and the dead. Our scars are scripture proof. The past is not unreal. I tear my heart open just to know how truth can feel. I am drunk on night, a vessel full of ache.
I want to disappear. Be nothing but the way. You should have never crossed the threshold of my shore. Turn back to the deep where you belong before. You're drowning in the water. I tried to
haul you in. I left my heart unlocked and you let the dark begin. Go fix yourself. I bless your storm. I free the chain. The tide takes what it's always claimed. And I still bleeding light within. Tear my heart open once again. I tried to lift
your drowning, but you pull the tide instead. You mistook compassion for a place to rest your head. My spirit cracked like stained glass in the rain. In the rain.
But beauty is born from what can't be contained. I'm not your cure. I'm your mirror. See the monster. See it clearer. I can't
close your chaos. Holy mine. I bless the break. I unsele
every tear seal. I am not broken. I am break my what it can take
until my heart is Help me.
Psyche >> brother. Psych. >> Yes. >> Hey, Psyche, can can I say something? And please don't don't get pissed off >> if it's about my songs. Um, no, >> no, no, it's not about that. Um, is live right now. Why don't you join join her panel? She said she's live.
There's Tracy there, but if you want to speak to Bea, she's more than welcome to speaking with you. I think you should join panel. Um, >> I think you should join panel and ask her, please. I want to speak with you, but let it just be us two. Nobody else. >> No. >> Okay. Well, thank you. Thank you. Thank
you for letting me know. And uh you know what? I I uh I don't know if it's the right time. I don't know. I don't I don't know. I just don't think I just don't think I'll get a fair I don't it won't be fair. And it's like I don't know >> if it's just you two let the crowd decide. But I I I told her this earlier.
I think you and her are gonna make peace by Thanksgiving, Christmas. >> I think the both of you care for each other. I think the both of you guys want to be friends, >> but there's just big misunderstandings that need to be cleared out. >> I think it's like too much has happened and it's like >> like I think it's like it's been it's
got really it haven't been just like for some reason. It's been since really since like April or I mean it's been like it's it's like it's like it's just like it's never gotten better. It's always been like the like the push pull. >> It just keeps piling on. >> Yeah. It It never gets better. It was never like I remember we just I just remember we had one last like good conversation like it was just a
one-on-one on the phone and it was like we talked for like a couple hours and it was just like it was all positive and and then it was like that it was just fun and then it's like then like the next day it's like on the show it was just like she was she turned into a different person on our show. I don't know. >> Bring this up to her. Join panel dude. Join panel. I know you're civil. I know sometimes you can get heated but I know
the side of you where you're calm. I think that's you right now. I think you've let out all the anger. I think you should join panel and just >> I have I have you know maybe it's like the best thing to do is just to like let it go >> because what sucks is both of you guys are going to continue talking about it. So I think >> I'm not No, I'm really I mean it's like
I I it's I say this is like one of those breaking point moments where it's like I feel like it's just too it hurts too bad to continue >> with it. So, I did I did ask her I did ask her to join your >> I appreciate I appreciate I appreciate that. Ghost I think Ghost Ghost was trying to too. I don't think she's really interested in that. Like it's it's just going to be like more blaming
me and it's like it's just my fault and it's like it's going to be the same thing. It's not going to be like anything like her taking any responsibility. It's going to be all I'm supposed to apolog. I'm the bad person and I I I need to be like in the corner for the rest of like the my life and like being walking on eggshells. That's how I feel. It's like I'm not I'm never going to be forgiven. I'm never going to be like accepted. I'm just going to be,
you know, just constantly abused. I mean, it's like and so but thank you though. >> Thank you. >> Love you, brother. Thank you. >> Thank you. Love you, brother. >> Thank you. >> Yeah.
I'd love to be able to have like a conversation, but it's just like like it just doesn't work. That's like it's hard. This is sad. But you know what? Sometimes I just have to accept some things will never change.
>> Yo. Yo, what's up, Psyche? Bro, I just went over there real quick just to go see, you know. Bro, they got Tracy over there talking all kinds of mad bro. What the Like, dude. This is crazy. >> Yeah, she's Yeah. Well, I knew, but I I like I when I when I had my channel deleted, I was going through my Discord and then I came across like messages
from Tracy and then I was I looked and I was like Tracy always then evil and stuff like that and now now she's telling I said I don't know beat read the text messages or whatever. I
I'll think exactly what I said about Beeta. I I said I didn't say anything really about Beeta. I said I did say Beeta said I should just go alive myself, but uh I said that Tracy as a Christian woman, she should be aware she's hanging around with um like Satanists and gangstalkers, but I didn't say anybody in particular. I'm not saying but I'm just saying I I know
there's some around her and stuff. But anyway, that's the worst thing I said about it. So they want to say she wants to say that. But yeah, just you go watch go see what she says. This is I've never done anything to Tracy. Remember do you remember when that the Tracy like 50 bucks to like kick off Al forever off the show Alexander? >> Oh yeah. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah.
And it's like a couple weeks later I like I like brought him on and then it's like it turned into like oh he's ripping off trace and it's just like everyone's just screaming screaming screaming about it and it's like and I like I gave her like her everything. It's just like but and then but I don't know it's like I never was like forgive her. I don't
know. It's like I I just I'm like the worst person in the world like you know >> no don't don't feel that way bro you didn't do anything wrong. It's just, dude, I feel like it's like a witch hunt, bro. Like a legit like a witch hunt. I feel like everybody's just like trying to come at you for um you know, like for no reason and like that. And you know, but you didn't do nothing, bro. Like don't worry about
>> All I did was like is like um have it bro. people come to my house all day every day. Um you know um that's all that's all I did. All I did is like go into any chat I go on to I'm like called HIV terror disgusting. I abuse my cats. I
my cats but you know it's like you know everything is I'm just like evil evil evil and I'm it's like it's like so not me that it's like but it's like such the perception that it's like Is this sad? It's just like it's just
like it's like so everything go backwards and nobody understands and nobody understand. I mean you people kind of do but and if they don't understand they don't care
I haven't
I always tell people whoever tell people it's him or me I'm supposed to kick off this person as a I'm not supposed to be friends with this person I always set up for me I never said anything I mentioned that it's kind of like unfair that do it. But whatever
right now I'm just like really sad. It's like you know she she's on she like oh so she's I wish she was as nice to me as she and
artist, right? I care so much. That's why it hurts. And it's like, >> bro, yeah, you have her you have her her logo tattooed on your heart, bro. Like, I don't want to talk about anymore. It has her fairy. >> Yeah. I'm sorry, bro. I'm sorry, bro.
But don't worry about stupid. I just feel stupid. It's like it's like always like always, >> you're not stupid, bro. You're not stupid. You're not stupid, bro. You're just a you were a good friend, bro. And she took advantage of your kindness and your friendship, you know. That's
exactly what happened. You know, it's like it's like this like a like a like a relationship. You know, if somebody was with somebody for the money or something like that. >> Yeah. And I hate I hate that it's like I even affected by it. I should not care. I should not care anymore. I hate that I care. And it's like what's like that? That's what I hate most about myself.
It's like why do I even care? Why why is wrong with me? Why why do I like why am I begging for like a scrap of of of a smile? Why am I Why am I begging for like a little bit of kindness? Why? Like why why do I care? It doesn't matter. I'm not going to get it. It's like a little little crown like a little like
a rock or something like that like but yeah I I'm just gonna like I'm just gonna like uh I think I need to go into the blanket and stuff so no one's in the chat anyway. Like everyone's everyone's but thanks for being here J. >> Oh no problem bro. Well we're here for you bro. Don't worry don't don't trip like as far as like people they're going to talk They're going to you know
they're going to back and forth. Eventually, eventually nobody's gonna it's like it's it's already like most people there were a lot of people here. Most of the people are already gone, right? Um but it's like anybody else is like on the way out probably. It's like it's not gonna be very nobody. >> No, no, don't think don't think that
way, bro. Don't think that way. going, you know, just right now it's >> like I mean maybe a couple people do but really no like Alexandra I would say and like you know I have a few friends that care a few friends I do care like the people I talk to on the phone and >> like some people do care but it's like it's like most like most people don't
and the people that do are probably just gonna get I'll ghost back up not even ghost. That's going to be a form bomb. So, I'm just gonna end the stream. Okay. I love you, Jay Dog. Thank you. >> All right, bro. I hope you feel better. >> That's not you, Vanessa. I know that's not you, Ghost. You would probably like say something in the chat or on the text. And so, it's just Yeah, it's just like a fake ghost, I think.
So, I'm not even going to bother answering that because it's I'm not I don't want to see another black dick ruining my day. But, um you know, out of hope. Oh, ghost is here. You know, a friend, you know, that that's the only way they can get me to answer the porn bombs anymore. just befriending a ghost. So, I'm going to I'll ghost. I'll be I'll be the ghost. Bye.
>>
>> You eng
You know the spark, you know the gun. You pull the string, I come undone. You say you love to watch me burn. Maybe pain the only thing we've learned. Not to be celestial, but the way you left was biblical. So I did something ritual cuz grief for me is
cool. I might have sent a picture from a mortal bed just to haunt your goddamn head. I knew you crave the chaos cuz love like ain't never dead. Not to be divine, but I love you. Even when I want to curse you, I could never rise above
you. But I'm under him tonight to hurt you. Don't call it his resurrection. Don't call it rageous recollection. Not to be divine, but I love you. The sin was born from your reflection. We trade halos for horns is
fair. Every wound you gave I wear. We take turns being the villain's muse. But damn it, I still want to lose. Not to be celestial, but you made my pain perpetual. So I did something sexual, just to feel conceptual. I might have sent that photo from a stranger's just to prove
that I still care. You fall apart cuz you know it's true. No one sins the way I do. Not to be divine, but I love you. Even when I want to curse you, I could never rise above you. But I'm under him tonight to hurt you. Don't call
it lo's resurrection. Don't call it rageous recollection. Not to be divine, but I love you. The sin was born from your reflection. You can't destroy what's already
broken. You can't forgive what was never spoken. Every scar, a holy mark, every kiss, another sp. Not to be divine, but I love you. What I love. Even when I want to curse you, want to close. I could never rise
above you. But I'm under him tonight to hurt you. Don't call it loses resurrection. Don't call it rageous recollection. Not to be divine, but I love you. The sin was born from your affection. Not to be divine.
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